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Author: Michelle Warner

Mom Win Wednesday: Ashley Hendley

2 / 15 / 172 / 15 / 17

As a mom, you may not have qualified for the Rio Olympics, but you certainly deserve a spot on the podium in our eyes. There are no “perfect scores” in motherhood, but if you had a discipline breakthrough, managed a meltdown, or found time in your day to pursue a dream, then we want to take a moment and celebrate alongside you. Even the little “victories” add up to be big wins in the long run; so let’s champion each other. After all, we’re on the same team.

Michelle
Michelle

I’m so excited to introduce a college friend who is joining our blog team, Ash Hendley!

Michelle
Ash

Happy Wednesday, Readers! I’m a new wife (celebrating two years of marriage next month) and an even newer mom to this cutie pie, who is almost six months old.

Not pictured is our rambunctious German Shepherd puppy, Huckleberry, who doesn’t understand that he’s not the baby any longer. Motherhood messed me up in the best possible way, but I’m so thankful for this precious gift from God!

Michelle
Michelle

I definitely know what you mean. And oh my goodness, what an adorable picture! So do you wear any other hats in addition to your [big, gigantic, hugely significant] Mom Hat?

Michelle
Ash

Besides my mom hat, which is handy to cover up my I-didn’t-take-a-shower-today-hair, I also work in development for a non-profit, meaning I write a lot of grants, and I serve as Editor for my husband’s seminary papers as he finishes up his MDiv. I am also the Dog Walker, Home Decorator, and Thrift Store Shopper in our little family.

Michelle
Michelle

You go girl! Lots of hats you’re juggling. So tell us about your precious cutie!

Michelle
Ash

Our little lady is almost six months and man, what a crazy and wonderful and hard six months it’s been. She is a happy, smiley little ball of energy and I love to watch her figure out new tricks. I am forever texting the grandparents with each new milestone, like when she recently discovered her toes! Haha! Her footy pajamas are always wet from all the chewing.  ☺️

Most mornings she wakes up with a smile on her face when I get her out of her crib, and is quite content to lay in bed and babble at 6 am. I have no idea where she inherited this cheerful morning disposition. I am a complete zombie until after my first cup of Starbucks. Oh yes, we started buying the good stuff to brew at home!

Michelle
Michelle

Haha, I am the same way. I have utter admiration for any mom who doesn’t need a cup of coffee to get them moving in the morning. ?  What is a recent mom win you experienced that took time and perseverance to accomplish?

Michelle
Ash

We recently started physical therapy to help with some tightness in her neck, which is causing her develop a flat spot on her head because she only sleeps on one side. This sweet child of mine does not enjoy the stretches that we have to do multiple times a day, and expresses her disdain quite ardently! I know it’s for her good, but I hate doing something that brings her discomfort. But we have persevered and she is slowly getting used to it, and we’ve figured out creative ways to distract her while we’re doing her physical therapy. If this is hard, I just know I’m going to be a wreck the first time she has to go to the ER!

Michelle
Michelle

Oh I can only imagine how much she doesn’t enjoy that. I feel like I’ve learned a lot in those experiences about God’s love…that even when things may not feel pleasant for me at the time, I can imagine Him saying, “I promise this is really good for you even if it hurts right now.” What is a mom win that you would text your best friend?

Michelle
Ash

My best friend from college had her first baby seven weeks after me, so we are always exchanging notes and ideas on the good and the bad, including our experiences with cloth diapering! Recently I had to admit I was giving up on using cloth diapers, which was so hard to let go of! I had really wanted it to work for our family, but hard water issues were causing major leaks and meant multiple outfit changes a day. I just had to decide to stop using them, or risk losing my mind! My friend is still using them, so I felt like such a failure! But once I just admitted it wasn’t working, I felt so relieved! Off to find some Pampers coupons . . .

Michelle
Michelle

Good for you for trying! I totally know what you mean. We had to supplement in feeding for our oldest for a bit and I felt like such a failure. Isn’t it crazy what we deem as a failure when really it just isn’t how we envisioned it in our minds? I think that’s a big step when you let go of how you want it to go in order to help your child thrive  – so YAY! What a big mom win. ?

Anything else you are learning as a mom right now?

Michelle
Ash

In the trenches is exactly how I feel most days! As a new mom, I find myself very easily overwhelmed with getting it all done-working full-time, making sure we all have clean clothes, lunches packed, and a clean house. I am a “doer” by nature, but in this new role the Lord is reminding me to slow down and let go of needing to get it all done. On the hard days,  it’s encouraging to know that it won’t always be like this. But on the sweet, snuggly, good days, I’m sad that it won’t always be like this. I want to enjoy each new day and be more concerned with enjoying my baby and less concerned with the dirty floors and dishes in the sink.

Michelle
Michelle

I think that is one of the most challenging things as a mom — learning when to push the tasks away to be present with your kids. That is definitely something I am praying through right now.

Thank you so much for sharing your heart with us. We are so excited to have you on the team and share what you’re learning as a new mom and wife. ❤️

Michelle

If you would like to be featured as a Gold Medal Mom or you know someone who would, please contact us here!

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Off the Wagon and Into Grace

2 / 3 / 172 / 16 / 18

Jessica
Jessica

I totally fell off the healthy eating wagon this weekend! I do so well during the week, staying focused on how to eat to fuel my body and then the weekends come along and I can’t seem to control myself in splurging on unhealthy foods that I KNOW are not good for me!

Jessica
Laura
Laura

I’m right there with you!  Weekends can be full of food temptations.  I helped myself to a “healthy” slice of cake this weekend at a friend’s birthday party.  And then some of the leftovers seemed to magically jump in the car to come home with me! ?

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

Haha!  I know that story well ?! I’m totally beating myself up because of my lack of self-control!  

Jessica
Michelle
Michelle

I know what you mean — when I do something I’m not proud of, I feel like I just hear the negative self-talk reverberating in my mind…

Michelle
Jessica
Jessica

Yes!  And then those bad feelings about myself impact my day and how I interact with my kids.  It’s a vicious cycle.

Jessica
Laura
Laura

I hear you on that!  One day last week, I thought I was doing well with my eating and exercising, so I decided to weigh myself only to discover that the scale didn’t agree.  My whole demeanor fell into discouragement.  I try not to talk to the boys about my weight because I don’t want them to think about themselves negatively like I sometimes do about myself, but I still see a huge difference in my treatment of them and my husband when I feel cruddy about myself.  It’s bad enough I let the scale dictate to me who I was, but then I let it affect my family.

Laura
Michelle
Michelle

You’re right on because when I am hearing lies about myself, I feel defeated and discouraged and that spreads into how I respond to everyone!

Michelle
Jessica
Jessica

I know…It’s like I tumbled off that wagon and I’m laying on the side of the road watching it take off without me!

Jessica
Laura
Laura

Is it just me, or does the wagon reference make anyone else think of the countless hours we spent as children playing Oregon Trail?   ?  Sorry to digress!

Laura
Michelle
Michelle

Haha! Well, now you have me thinking about it!  Wasn’t it super hard to make it to the end of that game?  Everyone always died of cholera and dysentery.  Oregon seemed to be this elusive place that no one really made it to.

Michelle
Laura
Laura

Maybe the wagon reference isn’t too far off!

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

You’re probably right!  Saying “I fell off the wagon” makes it sound like I’m on a path to some elusive place of victory.  Really I just made some bad choices.  I took my eyes off of my focus on honoring God with my body.

Jessica
Laura
Laura

Like how Peter took his eyes off Jesus while walking on water.

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

Wow, yes!  And then Peter began to sink, very much like me!

Jessica
Laura
Laura

But in that story of the Bible, Peter calls out to Jesus and Jesus rescues him.  I think you need to give yourself some grace and ask God to help you re-start in this moment.  He cares too much about you to let what happened over the weekend affect His relationship with you!

Laura
Michelle
Michelle

I also think in these situations that play right into some of my lies about myself, I am learning to talk to God about it before it happens. Like – Okay, God, you know my weakness and weekends are hard for me to stay committed in healthy eating choices. Would you help me when I’m tempted? And when I fall off the wagon, will you help me to accept your grace and begin again? Sometimes I think I lean too heavily on my willpower instead of remembering that God’s power will give me all I need.

Michelle
Laura
Laura

And when we do mess up, it isn’t like the wagon is totally lost and our whole family destroyed along with it and we’ll never make it to Oregon… He is with us, mending our brokenness.  We don’t even have to wait to trade with Him for a new axle or another ox or whatever! He just has everything we need!  Including how to transform our own thinking about our “defeat.”

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

You’re right.  God doesn’t want me to wallow in the choices I have already made.  God gives me grace and wipes my slate clean each moment.   And when I accept His grace, I feel empowered to make more positive choices starting now. ? ?

I’m not on a path towards victory, I’m taking steps with God in victory.  

Jessica
Laura
Laura

What a great concept to model for our kids.  They are all going to face struggles with making choices (how many times have I said, “that wasn’t the best choice” or “try again!”).  If we know we can walk in His victory and grace regardless of our choices, then we can show them how to do the same.  And I don’t know about you, but I would love to see my kids walk through life with that kind of grace!

Laura

Soaking in the Truth

 

Scripture to encourage you:

    • Matthew 14:28-33 (MSG)  Peter, suddenly bold, said, “Master, if it’s really you, call me to come to you on the water.” He said, “Come ahead.” Jumping out of the boat, Peter walked on the water to Jesus. But when he looked down at the waves churning beneath his feet, he lost his nerve and started to sink. He cried, “Master, save me!” Jesus didn’t hesitate. He reached down and grabbed his hand. Then he said, “Faint-heart, what got into you?” The two of them climbed into the boat, and the wind died down. The disciples in the boat, having watched the whole thing, worshiped Jesus, saying, “This is it! You are God’s Son for sure!”
    • Hebrews 12: 1-2 (NLT)  Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.  We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.  Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne.

Music to inspire you:

    • “Courageous” by Casting Crowns

Readings to come alongside of you:

    • “We are only one good choice away from being back on the path of perseverance.” – Lysa TerKeurst, Made to Crave
    • Why Falling Off the Wagon Isn’t Fatal  by Maia Szalavitz 
    • Environment is Stronger Than Willpower by Arlene Pellicane 
    • “I haven’t often prayed to a God who says, ‘We’ve got this; we’ll do it together. Your failure doesn’t rattle me. Your limitations don’t bother me.’ But I do now, little by little. Because now when I step out of that boat, I’m starting to see a man with love in his eyes, a man who will rescue and rescue and rescue , and then bring me to safety, despite my faithlessness, despite my failure.” Present Over Perfect: Leaving Behind Frantic for a More Soulful Way of Living by Shauna Niequist

Living Out the Truth

Ideas to try:

    • Come up with some measurements of success for yourself that don’t involve the number on the scale or the number on your clothing tags.  Think of how God would want you to measure your success.  Some examples may be, “Have I eaten only out of physical hunger today?” or “Have I asked God to be present and help me be mindful during meals today?”  
    • If you’re like me and struggle with your relationship with food, I wrote an 8-week  Bible study called “Shedding the Weight” that I would LOVE to share with you! Subscribe to our email list above on the right side of the page under “Connect with Us” to receive your FREE copy of this study.  The link will go out in our weekly subscriber email.

(These suggestions are ideas from novice moms.   Sometimes our life situations need more.  In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.)

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