Tag Archives: Katie Duh

Back to School in the Time of Corona

Katie

So I officially registered my kids for our district’s virtual learning program for this school year.

Virginia

Congrats on making a decision! I think one hard part for me was just pulling the trigger.

Katie

Yes! I agonized about it, too! But once I actually made the decision, I felt a weight lifted off my shoulders.

Virginia

I’m happy you have peace about it. How’d you decide?

Katie

Lots of factors. I have the flexibility to make home instruction work, so I’d like to minimize my family’s exposure to COVID where possible. We also feel the necessary safety restrictions at school will take away our favorite social aspects of school. And with virtual learning, our kids will still be connected with great teachers.

Virginia

It’s good that you were able to hone in on your priorities. 

We decided to send our kids back to school. H will be in our church preschool and my son, C, will be in public school. It took me a while to get there, though. We all want to make the “right” decision.

Katie

I think there are many benefits to being in the school building, too! I don’t think there is a right or wrong decision about school this year. So many uncertainties and no easy solutions.

Virginia

Yeah, you and I are in the same circumstance in that we are fortunate to have the ability to stay home. But, my daughter (preschooler) needs the attention that she missed when I was hustling to homeschool back in the spring.

Katie

I can totally understand that!

Virginia

And on the flipside, since my schedule will involve driving her to and from her school that may conflict with a potential virtual school schedule for her older brother.

Katie

Each family’s circumstances are different, so it makes sense we sometimes make different choices. Once I made the decision to keep our kids home and stopped worrying about what other people might choose (or how they may feel about my decision), I’ve felt more free to get excited about this coming school year and focus on making the most of it.

Virginia

So I’m starting to imagine some very cute Pinterest-y work stations at your house….:)

Katie

Hahaha … or some humorous Pinterest fail moments to remember at least.?

Virginia

Lol! Please post pics. 

It’s impressive to me that you’re taking your child’s preferences into the equation. It can be easy to dismiss those. I remember you mentioning your two middles don’t want to go back to school.

Katie

Yes – and my oldest only wants to go back once he can play football with 30 of his classmates every day during lunch recess.??

Virginia

Well, I hope he doesn’t have to wait much longer for that.  

What I find funny is we’re both former teachers and I don’t want to homeschool and you do.

Katie

Yes! And that’s totally okay. You know, I never planned to homeschool. I’ve always been a public school advocate and active volunteer at my kids’ schools. So, I had to take a moment to grieve that “loss” as I made the decision to keep our kids home this year.

Virginia

And it’s okay to acknowledge that. God doesn’t expect us to instantly don a smile and prance around a flowery field when we learn that life isn’t meeting our expectations. We’re allowed our feelings.

Katie

Prance around a flowery field.???

Virginia

Remember when Lazarus was really sick and Mary and Martha sent for Jesus? He took his time to return and Lazarus died. Jesus didn’t pop in and say, “Why are you ladies so upset? I’m going to bring him back to life!” He wept with them because his friends were in pain.

Katie

Jesus knows our pain and grieves with us.

Virginia

Yes, and He also shows us another strategy to get through tough times. In Genesis 1, we see him creating, then stopping. Then some more creating, and then stopping. It’s not like He needed a chance to take a nap. He is showing us how to move forward, whether the road is rocky or smooth.

Katie

That is so true! God could have created everything in one instant, but instead He showed us how to take it slow and value the process. 

I’m praying God will give me the strength and patience and wisdom to make the most of this challenging year. And just to be faithful with what He wants me to do one day at a time.

Virginia

Perfectionism will try to get us to question ourselves and our choices if we don’t hit the ground running and have everything smooth sailing by day 2 of this school year….

Katie

Here’s to letting go of perfect and just pouring our hearts into whatever God lays in our paths this year!

Soaking in the Truth

Scripture to encourage you:

  • “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.” (Colossians 3:23, NIV)
  • “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” (James 1:5, NIV)
  • “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in You.” (Isaiah 26:3, NIV).
  • “He is the Rock, His works are perfect, and all His ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is He.” (Deuteronomy 32:4, NIV)
  • “And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness. God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the first day.” (Genesis 1:3-5, NIV)
  • “When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, ‘Lord, if you had been here, my brother (Lazarus) would not have died.’ When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. ‘Where have you laid him?’ he asked. ‘Come and see, Lord,’ they replied. Jesus wept.” (John 11:32-35, NIV)

Music to inspire you:

Readings and Resources to come alongside of you:

Related Posts on Texting The Truth:

Living Out the Truth 

Ideas to try:

  • Focus on the priorities of your family and move forward without guilt. Remember to take your own personality and desire into consideration as well. We’re not all cut out to be teachers and that’s okay too. Don’t try to keep up with anyone else. 
  • Please also remember that we may doubt our decisions from time to time and this is normal. Make sure you talk out loud to your trusted friends and family about these thoughts. Bottling the emotions up will not be helpful. 
  • Pray: Ask God for wisdom. Be honest with Him; He already knows what you’re feeling.
  • Ask Him to multiply your talents to give your children the best year possible. If He can feed 5,000 people with five loaves and two fishes, He can surely help you in any situation.
  • Whether learning at home or school, stay engaged with what your kids are learning. The partnership between home and school really makes kids feel important, and teachers love to know you are involved and willing to help. 
  • If your children are going to school, consider giving them a binder clip to attach their mask on their shirt during lunchtime so it does not sit on the desk or fall on the floor. 
  • If you send goodies to school, make sure they are pre packaged.  Also, include the front office, bus driver, custodians, and administration. 
  • If schooling at home this year, here are some trusted sources and ideas from the Spring: Generic “Just for Fun” Educational Ideas.

Treasured Products we love: 

  • For school at home, it might be helpful to have younger kids get a handwriting book.
  • Especially if they are riding a bus to school, students may benefit from K-N95 masks.
  • Students might like to have hand sanitizer they can attach to their backpacks. 
  • In place of using school water fountains, stock up on personal water bottles that close over the mouthpiece, like this one. 
  • You can spoil teachers even if they are virtual. The Teacher Care Crate is an easy monthly subscription for elementary age students who have one primary teacher. 

{These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more.  In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}

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Raising Kids When the World Shows Its Brokenness

Note: BIPOC stands for Black, Indigenous, or People of Color; it is an inclusive way of referring to non-white people.

Jo

Katie, do you feel like you are in a movie right now, too? My heart hurts. Did you see the meme that said, “Alright…which chapter in Revelation are we doing today?”

Katie

Oh, Jo! It feels so surreal. And sad and infuriating. And … I just don’t even know how else to describe the emotions!

Jo

I feel angry and out of control, but I know how I’m feeling is not nearly as hard as people who are BIPOC* after George Floyd’s murder. We were already on the edge with Coronavirus, and then this happened last week on the heels of Arbery and Cooper.

Katie

Racial injustice and police brutality aren’t new, but I think that is part of what makes it so terrible, right? The fact that this brokenness and evil has been here so long – and it’s still here.

Jo

So, my son N overheard me on the phone the other day. He immediately said, “Mommy, the police are supposed to help people, not kill people. He needs to go to jail.” So, now we are walking through this with him at six years old…he is the same age as George’s daughter.

Katie

Oh, their little hearts! Our kids do pick up on everything, don’t they? And, honestly, as hard as I know those conversations with N must be for you, I do think they are so important.

Jo

I feel like teaching about racial bias and overall acceptance of people who are different is my responsibility as a mom, and we try to be aware of our perspective as a white family (our white privilege). How has it been going for you all?

Katie

You know, my kids weren’t aware this time of anything happening in the news. But, I decided to bring it up at breakfast this morning. I wanted to be intentional with them.

Jo

Good for you.

Katie

Not going to lie, it felt awkward. And I wasn’t sure if I used the right words. But, I’m really glad we took the time to have a conversation.

Jo

This is one of those times to be messy and real rather than concerned with the “right way.”  Home should be safe to let it all out and ask anything.

Katie

I’m certainly never going to get it all perfect – and waiting until I am totally sure of what to do won’t help. I’ve had lots of conversations with my kids about race over the years. I’ve tried to make it something we talk about and don’t shy away from.

Jo

That’s awesome. For me, race and hate are almost harder to take on than the sex talk. But the conversations about race and other kinds of prejudice *could* be totally avoided for people with privilege.

Katie

True. As a biracial family, we have been forced to talk about race. I am thankful for that. My Asian-American husband has shared with me some of his own personal experiences with racial prejudice, which of course is different than the African-American experience. I’ve tried to listen and read over the past several years, to understand more about the daily experiences of people of color – and I want to be intentional to keep listening

Jo

Our loved ones need us to listen now more than ever. And, yes, for sure, white women like us and our friends need to put in the work here. We just cannot expect our BIPOC friends and loved ones to hold our hands through this journey either.

Katie

I know I am privileged to be white and raised in a middle-class, suburban neighborhood. To have access to quality education and health care. To not be afraid of being wrongly accused by neighbors or police. But I also know I still have more to learn about just how much I have benefited from white privilege and opportunity.

Jo

This was the first time I had to explain injustice to N, and I know my conversation went differently than my friends’ conversations went with their kids who are not white.

Katie

I think having those honest conversations is one of the ways we can empower our kids to make a difference.

Jo

I asked, “What would you do if you saw someone being hurt by a policeman?” He said he would call 911 on the police. It was so simple in his mind. Of course it was much more complicated for the witnesses on that day with George.

Katie

I like that you made the point to challenge N to stand up for what is right.

Jo

It’s not always easy. Right now, I know people have been too afraid of doing wrong that they have just been silent to stay polite and “non-controversial.” I just can’t do that at home or publicly. One of my friends said, “Compassion is not political; it is human.”

Katie

Agreed. I’ll admit it has been easier for me to talk to my kids about history and racism in the past than current issues.

Jo

Yes, it is more comfortable when the pain is not fresh. And now more than ever, evil is sneaky and taking on every color and form. None of this is easy. Maybe that’s why I have had a headache for two days?

Katie

And maybe why I keep replaying everything in my mind and wondering if I have done enough.

Jo

No joke. The past five days I have been in a frenzy of researching again and reflecting. Have you posted on social media?

Katie

To be honest, I have felt myself pulling away from social media and from all the articles. 

Jo

A lot of people have numbed out or turned it off. But think about it. If you are not white, you can’t. You live with it all the time.

Katie

I don’t want to ignore it or turn numb. I also don’t want to just post my outrage on social media and then forget about it next week. I want to respond in a way that is meaningful and that lasts. I think that’s why I’m trying to be intentional with my kids.

Jo

You’re so good at being intentional, not just with injustice but in all of your momming, Katie! Honestly, I have struggled with striving and performing in a lot of areas. The older I get, the more I feel comfortable with vulnerability. Having friends who challenge me helps the most.

Katie

Thank you, Jo. We need to challenge each other, and we all need help making change happen at our kitchen tables.

Jo

Yes! I keep thinking of this quote from Mother Teresa: “If you want to change the world, go home and love your family.” So what does love at home look like when the world is showing all its brokenness?

Katie

I think love includes having hard conversations with yourself, your spouse, and your kids as an informed mama.

Jo

Preach. Let’s get to work. 

Truth to Inhale

Soaking in the Truth

Scripture to encourage you:

  • “Help to carry one another’s burdens, and in this way you will obey the law of Christ.” – (Galatians 6:2, GNB)
  • “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” (Genesis 1:27, NIV)
  • “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well . . . All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” (Psalm 139:13-14,16, NIV)
  • “There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” (Galatians 3:28, NIV)
  • “He has shown you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” (Micah 6:8, NIV)
  • “Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity!” (Psalm 133:1, ESV)
  • “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.” (Philippians 2:3-4, NIV)
  • “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” (Psalm 51:11, NKJ) 
  • “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:23-24, NIV) 
  • Jesus turning over the tables in the temple (Mark 11:15-17) 

Music to inspire you:

Readings and Resources to come alongside of you:

Truth to Exhale

Living Out the Truth 

Ideas to try right now:

  • Be honest, simple, and straightforward with your children about racism – even if it feels awkward or you aren’t sure how to start the conversation. During breakfast this morning, I (Katie) just read several of the verses listed above to my children. I asked them what they thought those verses meant, and they said things like “God made us” and “God wants us to love everyone.” I explained to them that I picked those verses today because there were lots of things in the news right now about people in our country being mistreated because of their skin color, because they are black. And people protesting in our city and many others. My seven year old was confused and surprised, “That’s really happening now? Didn’t that happen a long time ago?” I told him, yes, and unfortunately it still sometimes happens today. I reminded my kids of what they know about how God made everyone in His image and with purpose, how everyone is equal and valuable and beautiful because God made them, and how He wants us to treat everyone with love and respect. 
  • So, how I (Jo) handled the rest of the conversation with N about George and the policemen went like this. In response to the police, I said, “Just because someone has a title like policeman does not mean they automatically always do the right thing.” We talked about how those with hate in their hearts abuse other people (even those with important jobs like police, teachers, doctors, and other leaders), so you always have to watch how people treat everyone, not just you. 
  • Go out of your way to acknowledge the beauty and worthiness of people of all colors in front of your children. Sometimes parents may be embarrassed when their young children verbally comment on someone’s skin color. I don’t think we need to be embarrassed. Instead, let’s give our kids the vocabulary to talk about race and to show respect for people of all colors. The goal is not to raise children who are color blind, but who see and appreciate the diversity of all people.
  • We have friends who look different than us and have different backgrounds. Like, real friends. Not just people on a “friend list” or casual acquaintances. If you are always surrounded with people who look like you and share your world view, consider if that is really the healthiest way to live and raise your kids. How might you work to expand your horizons? 

Treasured Products we love: 

Going Deeper into Truth: 

  • Before you post something, ask yourself: Is this just trying to look good without doing anything of significance? Or is it an authentic means of showing support and raising awareness?
  • We all know how it feels to be judged and hated for reasons beyond our control, even if we have not experienced systems of oppression overtly. We can identify with the kind of pain the Black Lives Matter movement is trying to eradicate. Let’s reflect for a moment on the most recent three… Do you help your friends feel safe at work or in potentially racially dangerous spaces like running alone? If you were suddenly startled or frightened, would you react with grace? If we really know Jesus, we know that it is not right to hurt people who beg for mercy. We know it is not right to be complicit when we see bad things happen, even if those people have power over us. But, take a step back from what happened with Arbery, Cooper, and Floyd. On an everyday basis, when you hear people complain, even your own family members, or worse — they make a racially charged comment or joke — do you say something? What’s the worst thing that can happen if you do? If you don’t? 
  • Where do you see your weaknesses? What from this blog has rubbed you wrong?  Have you ever prayed to God about your biases? Have you honestly asked His perspective?  Have you considered that Jesus was in fact a black man? His beliefs made people so incredibly uncomfortable. When was the last time you pushed the envelope like he did, full of grace and truth?

What else do you do that we can start doing, too?  What are some other resources you can share with our TtT Community?  Comment below or send us a DM. Let’s help each other. 

{These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more.  In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}