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Tag Archives: mom win

Moms in Progress: Erin Durbin

2 / 11 / 202 / 12 / 20

Anna
Anna

Hey, Texting the Truth moms! You are going to love this text convo with one of the most honest, hard-working moms I have ever known, and a mom of two boys who have ADHD — Erin Durbin!

Hey, Erin! Thanks for talking with us!

Anna
Erin

Hey everyone! Thanks for asking me to write!

Anna
Anna

Tell us a little about this beautiful picture (you guys are so photogenic)! And tell us about these two handsome Durbin boys.

Anna
Erin

I am very proud of this not so perfect family. We have all learned so much about each other and ourselves throughout the years. 

Evan is 10 and Mason will be 8 in a couple of weeks. Evan is smart and mechanically inclined. Mason is my creative architect.

Anna
Anna

Hmm, smart and creative. Sounds like a certain famous hairstylist I know…?

Anna
Erin

Haha—I don’t know about famous, but yes I am a hairstylist running my own business, so I wear all the hats! Accountant, receptionist, cleaning lady and buyer. But, most importantly, my chair is my ministry and my purpose is to be a good friend, listen, and give advice if asked or needed.

Anna
Anna

As a friend and client of 14 years, I have loved talking with you while you do my hair! So many great conversations have come from that chair, I bet! You have a pretty cool job.

Anna
Erin

I really do!!! I love my job.

Anna
Anna

Okay, on to the deeper stuff. I know that you have been really challenged over the past few years when it comes to parenting and learning more about ADHD. I know, too, that there are a lot of moms out there who are experiencing similar things. Can you talk to us about what you’ve been through?

Anna
Erin

My husband and I have been on a very long journey these past few years trying to get control of bad behavior with both of our children. This has affected everything: home life, classroom settings, caregivers, and even summer camps. No one likes to see their children suffer. It became such a problem that we needed to seek medical attention. This behavior was beginning to have real life consequences that would affect our family as a whole. Long story short, our children both have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).  We have seen lots of different doctors, psychiatrists, and psychologists trying to find the best route to help the boys. It hasn’t been easy between insurance and finding the most capable professionals in the field, but we have finally found “our people” for now.

Anna
Anna

I’ve watched you guys fight for your boys, through all the ups and downs, all the tears and the victories. Your stamina has inspired me!

Anna
Erin

Thank you, and it’s really an ongoing journey, but I feel like the kids are finally set up for success currently. Evan has gone from C’s and D’s to A’s and B’s in just one quarter of school. He gets along much better with his peers because he is able to control his impulses. Mason is currently using an IEP and is slowly catching up to the other students in his grade.

Anna
Anna

THAT IS AWESOME!!! I know that it hasn’t been easy, but look at how far they have come!

Anna
Erin

Yes — God has been teaching me patience. I prayed for it, and He gave me ALL opportunities to be patient. Boy have I made mistakes. So many mistakes. I am a work in progress myself. God has been diligently chipping away at me to make me a better mother.

Erin

Do you have any general words of encouragement for other moms in the trenches like you?

Erin

I have been looking forward to this question.  Ever since I was asked to write for Texting the Truth, God has been handing me material. I mean bombarding me with it! Sometimes He is not so subtle. 

I’ve learned that negative self talk is so damaging to your soul. It doesn’t come from God because God is love. We as mothers put so much pressure on ourselves, and society won’t let you get away with a thing. People spout judgement, and they always seem to know exactly what you “should” have done to stop this.

However, I am not the creator of these unique individuals who are my sons. Yes, I grew them in my womb, but God knitted them to be who they were going to be. Believe it or not, God made me the perfect mother for these boys. I have been called to be their shepherd, not their Creator. I have had to come to terms with what I have control of and what I do not. We as parents make mistakes just as our parents did with us.  When our children do it, we tell them, it’s OK to make mistakes because that is how we learn. Why is it that we don’t take that same advice? Do we shame our children when they keep making the same mistakes over and over? Well, let’s be honest, sometimes I do; but I’m working on that. Does it mean I love my children any less and I’m going to give up on them? Of course not. This is the way our God the Father feels about us.

Anna
Anna

So true!

Anna
Erin

Matthew 11:28-30 says. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

You cannot control everything. When we try we set ourselves up for failure and disappointment. Give it to God and trust in the Lord with all your heart.

Anna
Anna

Do you have anything else you would like to add?

Anna
Erin

If you are a mother and are struggling with the symptoms of ADHD or know love or care for a child with ADHD, please watch this video. ADHD: Essential Ideas for Parents by Dr. Russell Barkley, one of the leading professionals in the field. Get yourself an education that way you don’t feel like a fish out of water at that IEP meeting. If you need support please visit www.CHADD.org for information and resources. There are groups on Facebook and even real live people in your area that can offer advice and encouragement. Become the expert on what you are working with.  

This is what I have learned from this whole journey. I am a great mom. I’m not a perfect mom, but I am a mom in progress.

Do you have a story to tell? Would you like to be featured in a future Moms in Progress post?  Just click here and answer a few questions to share the details of your story. We will do the rest!

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Moms in Progress: Janelle Gibbs

9 / 11 / 199 / 11 / 19

Anna
Anna

Hey, moms! Today we get to talk to one of our writers, Janelle Gibbs! You’ve probably read her texts on the blog, but you may not know much about her yet. We think it’s important for you to get to know the writers and give a little context to the blog conversations that you read!

So Janelle, tell us about your family photo! ?

Anna
Janelle

Hi, everyone! This is our most recent half decent family picture ?. It was taken on the 4th of July. As you can see, our middle daughter is holding a duck. She has two of them and loves them very much! Our dog Zoey is also constantly hanging out with us while we work in the yard. Our few acres provides our family plenty of opportunities to work together as we care for the animals and land.

Anna
Anna

How cute! I just love that you have this little farm and work on it together. Tell us a little more about your kids!

Anna
Janelle

We have 3 kiddos, ages 11, 8, and 2. They are a lot of fun and also constantly forcing me to rely on the Lord for parenting wisdom and strength! The oldest loves reading, Legos and guns. The middle one loves ducks, frogs and pigs. And baby girl is very fond of shoes, babies and cleaning!

Anna
Anna

Whoa, I wish one of mine was fond of cleaning! Let’s hope she keeps that preference as she grows up!

Do you wear any other hats in addition to your [big, gigantic, hugely significant] mom hat?

Anna
Janelle

I enjoy teaching barre twice a week at the YMCA, playing piano at church, keeping up our home and “mini farm”? and writing for Texting the Truth! ?

Anna
Anna

Yes! I have heard that you are a fabulous barre teacher.
What is your favorite book, podcast, or blog?

Anna
Janelle

Right now I’m reading the book Boundaries and I’m learning a lot — like what I’m responsible for and what I’m not. Learning to take responsibility for my thoughts, feelings, and actions, then acknowledging I’m not accountable for others’ choices is very freeing.

Anna
Anna

Yes, it is! I’ve been doing the Boundaries video subscription online: boundaries.me! I love it. I think a lot of their content is great for moms, especially. We can easily get sucked into thinking that we are responsible for everyone’s feelings and actions.

On to shopping! What is your favorite mom product?

Anna
Janelle

I don’t know if you’d consider ClickList (Kroger Pick-up) a product, but it’s amazing! Right after our youngest was born, I started grocery shopping online and found it to be the most convenient thing ever! I could grocery shop in my rocking chair while nursing the baby! And I didn’t make any impulse purchases or have to haul three kids to the grocery store who would also talk me into buying extra things! It’s a win-win in my book.

Anna
Anna

I totally agree! ClickList keeps me sane some weeks.
Speaking of groceries, what is your favorite simple meal to throw together?

Anna
Janelle

Recently I made shredded pork in the crockpot from homegrown pork. I served it as tacos with all the fixings. It was super simple and really yummy.

Anna
Anna

Simple and yummy are all I aim for these days! I’d say that’s a mom win.

Now onto perhaps a deeper question. Can you share a recent experience that challenged your mothering?

Anna
Janelle

My 6th grade son had an oral report due and he waited until the night before to start working on it, even though I had reminded him about it a couple days previous. (Ahem… anyone else have a procrastinator in their family?!)

Anna
Anna

Um, YES. I think my kids actually think it will only take ten minutes, no matter what the assignment is!

Anna
Janelle

Right! So when he finally did ask me to help him, I told him that I was busy with something else for a few minutes, but then could help him look up a current event for his report. He took that to mean that I was never going to help him and I didn’t care about his project… and it was all my fault that he was going to fail. ?(Insert — drama king…) I went on to explain to him that this was his project, not mine, and that he needed to take responsibility for his own failure to begin working on it earlier. Also that I would indeed help him like I said I would, just on my own timetable, not his. After some time thinking about it, he came to me and apologized for his attitude, for freaking out, for blaming me for his lack of diligence. And guess what?! I happily helped him find an interesting topic for his project!

Anna
Anna

You go, mama! It can be so frustrating when our kids melt down and say something is “all our fault” — but it sounds like you really kept your cool and held your ground. Such a good learning experience for him too.

Anna
Janelle

Thanks. But I was thinking — isn’t this just like we are with God sometimes? I know I am impatient and prideful at times, insisting on my own way. “God, I want this to happen, and I want it to happen now.” The problem is, God doesn’t operate on my timetable, nor does He tolerate my prideful insistence. He is patient and kind and merciful, but just as I teach my children to respect me and my time, God also tells me to wait sometimes. It’s my choice how I will respond. Am I going to throw a fit about it or choose to trust Him? I love what God can teach us through mothering our children! After all, God is our Father and He desires to give us good things! Maybe just not on the timetable that I have planned!

Anna
Anna

Wow, I definitely have to keep reminding myself that God isn’t working on my timetable!

Let’s end on a funny note. What is the funniest thing your kids have said or done recently?

Anna
Janelle

We live in the country and the fly population has been extraordinary this year. I even hung some fly strips around the house to help with the problem!! I am constantly swatting flies, and will every so often vacuum them off the floor. Needless to say, the other night as we sat down to dinner, there were a few dead flies on the kitchen floor.

My middle daughter loves frogs. She has several frog stuffed animals and she decided it would be nice to have a couple of them join us at the table for dinner. (One of them is as big as she is!) Not only did she settle in her frogs at the dinner table, (complete with baby sister’s bibs tied around their necks), but she also got a paper plate and went around picking up all the dead flies for her frogs’ dinner! ? (The creativity of children cracks me up!)

Anna
Anna

That’s adorable and I can just picture it! Bibs and all!

Do you have any last general words of encouragement for other moms in the trenches?

Anna
Janelle

You are your kids’ mom for a reason! He will give you the strength and wisdom you need when you need it. He promises to never give us more than we can handle without His help.

Do you have a story to tell? Would you like to be featured in a future Moms in Progress post? Just click here and answer a few questions to share the details of your story. We will do the rest!

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We don’t claim to have motherhood figured out. Actually quite the opposite. We’re a group of women who first and foremost love the Lord and want to honor Him with our lives and talents. And we decided that what better way for us to sort out this beautiful and messy thing called motherhood but to process it together in text messages? Our prayer is that as we share our real-life stories and honest experiences, every mom who visits our blog will receive tangible truth and experience real grace.

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