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Tag Archives: Moms in Progress

Moms in Progress: Erin Durbin

2 / 11 / 202 / 12 / 20

Anna
Anna

Hey, Texting the Truth moms! You are going to love this text convo with one of the most honest, hard-working moms I have ever known, and a mom of two boys who have ADHD — Erin Durbin!

Hey, Erin! Thanks for talking with us!

Anna
Erin

Hey everyone! Thanks for asking me to write!

Anna
Anna

Tell us a little about this beautiful picture (you guys are so photogenic)! And tell us about these two handsome Durbin boys.

Anna
Erin

I am very proud of this not so perfect family. We have all learned so much about each other and ourselves throughout the years. 

Evan is 10 and Mason will be 8 in a couple of weeks. Evan is smart and mechanically inclined. Mason is my creative architect.

Anna
Anna

Hmm, smart and creative. Sounds like a certain famous hairstylist I know…?

Anna
Erin

Haha—I don’t know about famous, but yes I am a hairstylist running my own business, so I wear all the hats! Accountant, receptionist, cleaning lady and buyer. But, most importantly, my chair is my ministry and my purpose is to be a good friend, listen, and give advice if asked or needed.

Anna
Anna

As a friend and client of 14 years, I have loved talking with you while you do my hair! So many great conversations have come from that chair, I bet! You have a pretty cool job.

Anna
Erin

I really do!!! I love my job.

Anna
Anna

Okay, on to the deeper stuff. I know that you have been really challenged over the past few years when it comes to parenting and learning more about ADHD. I know, too, that there are a lot of moms out there who are experiencing similar things. Can you talk to us about what you’ve been through?

Anna
Erin

My husband and I have been on a very long journey these past few years trying to get control of bad behavior with both of our children. This has affected everything: home life, classroom settings, caregivers, and even summer camps. No one likes to see their children suffer. It became such a problem that we needed to seek medical attention. This behavior was beginning to have real life consequences that would affect our family as a whole. Long story short, our children both have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).  We have seen lots of different doctors, psychiatrists, and psychologists trying to find the best route to help the boys. It hasn’t been easy between insurance and finding the most capable professionals in the field, but we have finally found “our people” for now.

Anna
Anna

I’ve watched you guys fight for your boys, through all the ups and downs, all the tears and the victories. Your stamina has inspired me!

Anna
Erin

Thank you, and it’s really an ongoing journey, but I feel like the kids are finally set up for success currently. Evan has gone from C’s and D’s to A’s and B’s in just one quarter of school. He gets along much better with his peers because he is able to control his impulses. Mason is currently using an IEP and is slowly catching up to the other students in his grade.

Anna
Anna

THAT IS AWESOME!!! I know that it hasn’t been easy, but look at how far they have come!

Anna
Erin

Yes — God has been teaching me patience. I prayed for it, and He gave me ALL opportunities to be patient. Boy have I made mistakes. So many mistakes. I am a work in progress myself. God has been diligently chipping away at me to make me a better mother.

Erin

Do you have any general words of encouragement for other moms in the trenches like you?

Erin

I have been looking forward to this question.  Ever since I was asked to write for Texting the Truth, God has been handing me material. I mean bombarding me with it! Sometimes He is not so subtle. 

I’ve learned that negative self talk is so damaging to your soul. It doesn’t come from God because God is love. We as mothers put so much pressure on ourselves, and society won’t let you get away with a thing. People spout judgement, and they always seem to know exactly what you “should” have done to stop this.

However, I am not the creator of these unique individuals who are my sons. Yes, I grew them in my womb, but God knitted them to be who they were going to be. Believe it or not, God made me the perfect mother for these boys. I have been called to be their shepherd, not their Creator. I have had to come to terms with what I have control of and what I do not. We as parents make mistakes just as our parents did with us.  When our children do it, we tell them, it’s OK to make mistakes because that is how we learn. Why is it that we don’t take that same advice? Do we shame our children when they keep making the same mistakes over and over? Well, let’s be honest, sometimes I do; but I’m working on that. Does it mean I love my children any less and I’m going to give up on them? Of course not. This is the way our God the Father feels about us.

Anna
Anna

So true!

Anna
Erin

Matthew 11:28-30 says. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

You cannot control everything. When we try we set ourselves up for failure and disappointment. Give it to God and trust in the Lord with all your heart.

Anna
Anna

Do you have anything else you would like to add?

Anna
Erin

If you are a mother and are struggling with the symptoms of ADHD or know love or care for a child with ADHD, please watch this video. ADHD: Essential Ideas for Parents by Dr. Russell Barkley, one of the leading professionals in the field. Get yourself an education that way you don’t feel like a fish out of water at that IEP meeting. If you need support please visit www.CHADD.org for information and resources. There are groups on Facebook and even real live people in your area that can offer advice and encouragement. Become the expert on what you are working with.  

This is what I have learned from this whole journey. I am a great mom. I’m not a perfect mom, but I am a mom in progress.

Do you have a story to tell? Would you like to be featured in a future Moms in Progress post?  Just click here and answer a few questions to share the details of your story. We will do the rest!

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Moms in Progress: Brittany Stark

1 / 29 / 201 / 31 / 20

Janelle

Today I’m excited to introduce you to a special mom in progress. She has encouraged me as a wife and mom, and she is also my little sister! We have always been close, but our friendship has changed over the years as we have grown up, married, had kids, and become distinct women with different interests and talents. 

Hello! Please introduce our readers to your family, Brittany. 

Brittany

Hi! My wonderful husband Dave and I have been married for 11 years. (Kinda funny but we met and married in only 7 months! ?) We have two boys ages 6 and 7. Together we run a welding and metal fabrication business out of a shop on our property here in Idaho. I also homeschool our boys and they help take care of numerous creatures including 3 Jersey cows, 2 ponies, a couple of horses, lots of dogs, cats, ducks and chickens. We enjoy many activities including reading aloud as a family, downhill skiing, boating, dirt biking, riding horses, shooting, and flying. My husband is a visionary and our life is rich with many experiences! ? I love being along for the ride on this adventure with him!

Janelle

Your life is definitely a fun adventure! Can you share a truth that has helped you navigate your busy life more smoothly?

Brittany

This morning I woke up with Proverbs 15:1 playing over and over in my head: “A soft answer turns away wrath but grievous words stir up anger.” It sparked a very good conversation with my oldest son which included me asking his forgiveness for NOT giving a soft answer.

Janelle

Hmmm, yes. I’ve been there too. Isn’t it funny that God often gives us the chance to apply what He’s been teaching us? That’s awesome that you used the opportunity to teach your son and model asking forgiveness when you messed up. What would you say is your hardest parenting struggle currently?

Brittany

My words. I tend to be harsh and frustrated in my choice of words and tone. God gently reminded me that it’s sin. It’s not a minor little detail. It’s big. And I want to start thinking of it and dealing with it like the big deal it is.

Janelle

That’s so true. What a great change in perspective! I would guess thinking about it as sin makes you more aware of the words you say and even the tone you use. Is there something that is going well in your mothering journey?

Brittany

As I write this, my boys and I are just back from an awesome ski day at our local ski resort. We have so much fun together doing all sorts of activities and I’m grateful for a lifestyle that allows us to go skiing instead of doing school! ? But we do school sometimes too.. ?

Janelle

Ha! I think most kids would love to be able to go skiing instead of going to school! Talk about getting out of a not-always-fun task! Is there a chore that you would rather not do??

Brittany

Haha. Clean. But does anybody really like to clean? ? Besides you?

Janelle

Hey now! I’m sure there are a few other people in the world that don’t mind cleaning too much!? When you’re not busy cleaning up after your kids or animals, what is your favorite outdoor activity to do as a family?

Brittany

We love to ride dirt bikes together in the desert or mountains near where we live. It’s a total boy activity, but I like to go along and carry the snacks and water on my bike which has a handy little rack. ?

Janelle

Super cool. What’s your favorite movie these days?

Brittany

Captain America? Haven’t seen too many movies lately unless you count running documentaries which I watch while I run on the treadmill…  ?‍

Janelle

Yes, that marathon we’re training for allows for lots of movies on the treadmill. ? Do you have a favorite app or podcast?

Brittany

Trulia. I like looking at houses.

Janelle

One of my favorite pastimes as well. ? How about something yummy you’ve cooked  lately?

Brittany

Oooo these little chicken pita wrap thingys from Costco that only take 50 seconds in the microwave! They are delish! And talk about quick meal prep too. It’s a win-win in my world. ??

Janelle

That’s a win-win in any busy mom’s life! Something that’s yummy and easy! What are you learning in marriage or motherhood?

Brittany

I’m learning that even when my life doesn’t seem to look like anyone else’s, that’s ok. It’s sometimes a disaster and scattered and I occasionally worry my children will never learn to write legibly, but God gave me a wonderful man to honor and these young boys to shepherd and love. He knows what’s on my plate and He will equip me for the work.

Janelle

That’s a good reminder for all of us- that God sees and knows and cares and He will give us the tools we need to do the job, however messy it may be. Thank you for sharing with us today! Love ya!

Do you have a story to tell? Would you like to be featured in a future Moms in Progress post?  Just click here and answer a few questions to share the details of your story.  We will do the rest!

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We don’t claim to have motherhood figured out. Actually quite the opposite. We’re a group of women who first and foremost love the Lord and want to honor Him with our lives and talents. And we decided that what better way for us to sort out this beautiful and messy thing called motherhood but to process it together in text messages? Our prayer is that as we share our real-life stories and honest experiences, every mom who visits our blog will receive tangible truth and experience real grace.

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