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Category Archives: Expectations

Dream Big, Hope for More, and Don’t Settle

7 / 30 / 21

We just got back from an epic family vacation: twelve states later, there we were in our Honda CRV with a bike rack, seven year old son, five toads, one turtle, one dog, and our marriage intact. If that does not inspire a hallelujah, I am not sure what would. We saw Maine, Cape Cod, D.C., and Virginia. Most of all, we saw each other without the obligations of a daily grind or schedule or chores. 

Seventeen months after the lockdown started, I wonder if you’ve been able to have a good rest too. And what’s more: How are your hearts? After a year of Corona plus societal upheaval and more…is your marriage alright? How are the kids? As moms, are we finally coming up for air or simply surviving? Summer is when I allow myself to breathe as a working mom; I know other moms breathe more in fall, but I think it’s so important to take these breaths whenever they come. In July, I am able to slow down and savor moments with my son. I reflect with a cold drink, my toes in the sand, and a book in my hand: a good beach read, to be specific. (Must be fiction and not too complex. Full stop.)

In deeper news, connections with church and true-blue friends seem better than pre-Covid times.  I can’t help but feel that this is all part of God’s plan. He had to take us down to the basics to build us back stronger. If we allowed it, He was pruning us during the past year and a half.  Looking back, I soldiered through the Spring-Fall of 2020, but Winter really pruned me hard. Has this been the same for you?  

In January 2021, I could not settle on a resolution or even a word to carry into the new year, but our pastor helped the congregation and in turn, me, as she laid out business-card-sized “star words” (think North Star guiding the 3 kings). My word was EXAMINE. And boy, did I need to examine myself. I dug deeper into the pieces where the Psalmist cried,  “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” I needed hope that God had blessings and room for me, even when I could not predict the outcomes.

Have you ever heard the wives tale of grabbing the brass rings on a carousel? While on a short ferry ride over to Martha’s Vineyard, we got to visit the “Flying Horses” (oldest carousel in the USA). Usually there was just one brass ring in old-timey carousels, and the child who grabbed it would get a prize such as a free ride or a stuffed animal. This one was different… If you rode a horse on the inner circle, you could grab for rings each time the carousel passed and collect them on a special metal spike coming out of each horse’s mane.  I went into the ride with Holden Caulfield vibes from Catcher in the Rye… but then noticed that everyone was collecting rings not to keep but to give to a girl with special needs on the carousel. Yes, they enjoyed grabbing the rings, but they also felt great giving them to someone who might benefit from them more. Are you catching this metaphor? 

There was more joy in the journey around the bend and grabbing the ring itself than what happened next…in the end, all the rings end up in the return chute and only one person gets the free ride, but everyone…everyone…had the chance to ride that inner circle and grab those rings. Such hope is free to everyone, if you choose to hold on to faith as tight as a horse’s reins. 

What’s more: God is faithful, even still. Whether or not we get the “prize” at the end of whatever carousel we might be on right now: work stuff, child rearing, romance, weight loss, you name it… He is for us. He has been there to hear my cries and dry my tears. Like Proverbs 4, God has been helping me, guiding me, almost audibly reminding me: “Make your eyes look forward; fix your gaze straight ahead. Carefully consider the path for your feet, and all your ways will be established.”

As moms, we have to pour out our love even when we feel empty; even when our faith is small and our hope seems scarce; even when we want to look away, down, or just a different direction than straight ahead. But for those of us who have been called to His purpose, take heart and remember Romans 8:28…“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him.”  

While we turn the corner into the second half of 2021 and summer gives way to fall, let us pray: 

Lord, please show us how to best examine ourselves & cleanse our souls so we can grab onto hope. Help us remain as faithful as You are to us.  Help us pour out love with eyes as clear and bright as a kid on a carousel. In Jesus’ name. Amen. 

Love, 

Jo

Soaking in the Truth 

Scripture to encourage you:

  • “You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.” (Psalm 139:5, NIV)
  • “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” (Psalm 139:23-24, NIV) 
  • “Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves.” (2 Corinthians 13:5-6, NIV) 
  • “Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life.  Don’t let your mouth speak dishonestly, and don’t let your lips talk deviously.  Let your eyes look forward; fix your gaze straight ahead.  Carefully consider the path for your feet, and all your ways will be established.  Don’t turn to the right or to the left; keep your feet away from evil.” (Proverbs 4:23-27, NIV)
  • “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him who have been called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28, NIV)

Music to inspire you:

  • Bluebird by Miranda Lambert 
  • Goodness of God by Jenn Johnson 
  • Believe for It by Cece Winans 

Living Out the Truth 

Ideas to try… Practically speaking, here are my best tips. 

  • Just add water this summer: 
    • Put on your bathing suit, remove your cover up, and get in the water with your kids, your spouse, or even on your own. 
    • Have a good cry and let everyone in your life do the same. 
    • Drink water during the day and enjoy a fun beverage in the evening too! Maybe that’s beer or wine or a nice cup of tea, but it is all needed in my humble opinion.  
  • Dream big, hope for more, and do not settle. I do not think we hear that enough. It’s okay to grab the brass rings. 
  • Sunshine Crate – send some love to someone else – it is contagious! Plus, you are supporting small businesses!

Resources to come alongside you:

  • Beth Moore’s Chasing Vines 
  • Free! Life Inventory from Jennie Allen’s July 2021 IF: Table Topic 
  • Is it weird for me to suggest a TV series? Call the Midwife is life-changing. 

{These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more. 

In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}

 

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Mommy Merit Badges

5 / 17 / 205 / 17 / 20

Well, Mamas, we are in the home stretch. Hopefully, homeschooling is coming to a close and you’re seeing a bright spot of relief as we head into summer break. You’ve accomplished so much! 

 

Can you take a moment to celebrate all that you’ve been able to do the past couple of months? Sometimes I can get bogged down with regrets and missteps. “I should have read with him more.” “I should have made her complete more writing assignments.” “I should have had a better attitude about being my child’s teacher.” 

 

Girlfriend, it’s time to ditch the “should’ve’s.” Insert your name in this statement: “I, ______,  am very proud of myself because I have ________ while also _______ and even______! I am a good mom.” 

 

Not convinced? Cue the flashback sequence…

 

Remember when you were in Girl Scouts? You had that forest green polyester sash and you couldn’t wait to adorn it with those scratchy patches. I haven’t even glanced at a Girl Scout Cookie order form in decades — I truly have no self control when it comes to Samoas! But have you checked the Girl Scouts’ site recently? There are so many updated achievement badges!

 

Check out this handy list to see what badges you’ve earned in Motherhood. (Note: The badge names and my respect for the Girl Scouts of America are real. The descriptions are not.)

 

You have changed the shavings in the hamster cage in your son’s room or fed a frozen mouse to an extremely large reptile: Animal Habitats Badge!

 

You’ve spent half of your waking hours of the day simply keeping your kids from endangering themselves: Safety Award!

 

You just scored some summer hand-me-downs from another mom friend: Savvy Shopper Badge!

 

You walked around the entire first floor of your house among dozens of toys without injuring yourself: Trail Adventure Badge!

 

That time you ascended an indoor playground twisty slide to bring your toddler back down to solid ground: Climbing Adventure Badge!

 

Your back hurts from sleeping on a pile of pillows while sleep training your toddler in his room: Camper Badge!

 

You took less than 25 snapshots to get a decent family photo: Digital Photographer Badge!

 

You effectively reduced screen time while homeschooling: Entertainment Technology Badge!

 

You attempted to sketch a dog but your child pointed out, “That looks like a horse, Mom,”: Drawing Badge!

 

You found your keys and wallet again: Geocacher Badge!

 

You know where that fine line exists between kissing the boo-boo and calling for an ambulance: First Aid Badge! 

 

That sweet baby called forth all of your musical and vocal skills to FINALLY be put to sleep: Musician Badge!

 

You just prepared grilled cheese cut into triangles for your daughter and rectangles for her older sister: Simple Meals Badge!

 

You brought yourself to the edge of your sanity by hosting a sleepover with ten 11-year-olds: Social Butterfly Badge!

 

You just figured out Facebook Messenger Kids about 5 minutes ago and you already changed the password twice: Cybersecurity Basics Badge!

 

Someone is not telling the truth, and the wall didn’t write it on itself, and the dog doesn’t have opposable thumbs: Detective Badge!

 

Someone’s got to turn on the Roomba: Programming Robotics Badge!

 

When you catch yourself rehearsing your regrets, take a moment and remember this encouraging verse from Psalm 139:14 NIV: “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”

 

Because these sentences are close together, I take that God’s personal Hand in creating us is an example of His Wonderful Works. That’s great news! You were made with and for a purpose! It’s time to pin on your own Mommy Merit Badge or two (or all of them), because you deserve it! 

~Virginia

#Coronavirus #Quarantine2020 #textingthetruthblog #realmomsrealgrace #meritbadges #GirlScouts

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We don’t claim to have motherhood figured out. Actually quite the opposite. We’re a group of women who first and foremost love the Lord and want to honor Him with our lives and talents. And we decided that what better way for us to sort out this beautiful and messy thing called motherhood but to process it together in text messages? Our prayer is that as we share our real-life stories and honest experiences, every mom who visits our blog will receive tangible truth and experience real grace.

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