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Category Archives: Mom Fears

Mama Wants a Rest for Mother’s Day!

5 / 13 / 174 / 19 / 18

Michelle
Michelle

Ugh, Anna, I am so tired. Like a no-nap-will-fix-this tired. ? ? ?

Michelle
Anna
Anna

I hear ya! For Mother’s Day, I would like a supplement called “Give-Mom-A-Break”!! A girl can only drink so much coffee!

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

Ha! My husband was asking what I wanted to do for Mother’s Day and I thought – can I ask for an uninterrupted time to nap??  

Michelle
Anna
Anna

Yes, you can! I think that’s a brilliant idea.

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

I’m trying to take care of myself more because I think some of my tiredness is plain physical. So I’m doing some practical things like eating more whole foods, taking some good supplements, and going to bed earlier…and that’s all good stuff, but I am realizing it’s deeper than my health. ?

Michelle
Anna
Anna

I agree. It’s deeper than that for me too. I also feel in-my-soul tired. I think some of it comes from negative thinking.

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

Oh me too. I have been struggling a lot with fear recently and I am realizing that it’s tiring me out. Too much of my energy is going to my what-ifs instead of to the positive things in my life.

Michelle
Anna
Anna

I listened to this message yesterday and the pastor said that every fear is draining you because it’s either about not measuring up or not having enough of something. I think my fears are both of those, and they run rampant in my mind, stealing my energy!  

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

For sure. I feel like my mind is always spinning – thinking about what I need to do to keep up with everything and on and on. Ugh. ?  I’m realizing lately I need to invite God into my thought-tornado.

Michelle
Anna
Anna

Yes! I think that is the key to stop this cycle (or tornado! I love it!). I do feel like I just want to stop the spinning in my mind. ?

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

I know what you mean. I was just reading the verse – Come to me all you are weary and I will give you rest. And it really struck me that God wants to give me rest even in the midst of the crazy days with my kids. Sometimes I think that in order to come to Him all has to be calm and that is never the case over here!

Michelle
Anna
Anna

So true. Calm is rare over here too. And if I try to sneak away from the fam for a little while, I end up feeling guilty about it and then I don’t really enjoy it!  

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

I think that is part of why we are so exhausted. Even if we don’t mean to, we have eight million roles to fill and things to do and people to attend to. I mean, I dreamed of having a family to take care of but I had no idea how exhausted I would feel trying to juggle it all.

Michelle
Anna
Anna

And how much pressure I would feel.  

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

Yes! I feel like I put a lot of pressure on myself to be all things to all people. And I admit I have trouble taking time for what I need. Or even just letting my girls watch some Paw Patrol so I can close my eyes or take a breather. I mean, let’s be honest, I do it, but I can feel guilty about it sometimes.

Michelle
Anna
Anna

Me too. You know, God did rest on the seventh day! And He called it holy! So I know that He intends for us to rest. And it doesn’t say, “And God rested on the seventh day, but He felt really guilty about it because He still had so much to do!” ?

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

Ha, that is true! I am realizing that when I allow myself to rest–whether that is lying down when I have a ton to do during nap time or taking some time for me in the evening even when laundry is piling up–it’s a way for me humble myself and admit I am not God.

Michelle
Anna
Anna

I never thought of it that way… humbling… ?

Anna
Michelle
Michelle

It’s kinda like I am saying to God – I need You and I trust You to be enough for me. So I’ll take this time to rest because this is what You have asked me to do and You know what is best for me. ?

Michelle
Anna
Anna

Yes — sometimes I think my completed To-Do List will be my “enough”, but it’s not, and anyway that never happens. So in this busy phase of life, I think I need to let God be my enough in the middle of all the undone things.

Anna

Soaking in the Truth

Scripture to encourage you:

  • “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me — what how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn how to live freely and lightly.” (Matthew 11:28-30, The Message)
  • “Everyone who drinks of this water will be thirsty again, but those who drink of the water that I will give them will never be thirsty. The water that I will give will become in them a spring of water gushing up to eternal life.” (John 4:13-14)
  • “My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I shall never be shaken…Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken.” (Psalms 62:1-2, 5-6)
  • “As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what He said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to Him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:38-42)
  • “By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.” (Genesis 2:2-3)

Music to inspire you:

  • “Just Breathe” by Jonny Diaz 
  • “Come To Me” by Jamie Grace

Readings and Resources to come alongside of you:

  • Walking with God in the Season of Motherhood 
  • Pressing Pause:100 Quiet Moments for Moms to Meet with Jesus 
  • Why Moms Need to Rest 
  • Where to Find Rest in the Weariness 
  • Proverbs 31: Finding True Rest 
  • “Do you know why we are so tired? Because we don’t believe God. There is no remedy for your striving apart from finding your identity in Christ. He is your enough, and the degree to which you believe that is the degree to which you will stop striving, stop performing, stop trying to prove yourself. I love this verse in Isaiah: ‘In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in truth shall be your strength.’ It is in our letting go and in our trust that He rescues us. Yet we are striving and we are working so hard for God. Guess what the person being rescued has to do? Trust the Rescuer and cooperate with the process.” Jennie Allen, Nothing To Prove 
  • “Seeing need and knowing only God can meet it causes us to run full of confidence, which means we can rest rather than strive. When Jesus promises us rest, He almost always is talking about soul rest. It’s why most of the ways we try to rest actually make our insides more chaotic. TV, sleep, Facebook–all fall short because nothing but Jesus can bring rest to the chaos inside of us. Through finding our identity in Him, confidence streams into our souls and empowers us to move creatively and intentionally through this life and somehow rest and enjoy it as we go about epic, eternal, world-changing, supernatural work.” Jennie Allen, Nothing To Prove 

Related Posts on Texting The Truth:

  • Not-So-Quiet Time 
  • Can Mama Get a Minute? 
  • Sick Day Survival 

Living Out the Truth

Ideas to try:

This is going to be really personal and will look different for each person. But here are some things I’ve found that work for me:

  • Ask for it. I ask my husband or mom to watch the kids, and I tell them that I really need a break. Then I do something that rejuvenates me. Maybe that’s going out for coffee with a girlfriend. Maybe it’s getting a pedicure. Maybe it’s just going for a walk!
  • Look for it. I snag ten minutes here or there to read, listen to something, put my feet up, or work on my favorite project.
  • Talk myself into it. I “let” myself not feel guilty about doing something just for me. Give yourself the gift of caring for yourself and not just everyone around you.
  • Don’t wait for it. And by “it” I mean total and complete exhaustion! Don’t wait until you are at that point to make time for yourself. Do it regularly, the same way you would any other preventative care.
  • Invite God into it. Ask God where in your life you could find some rest. Ask Him why you are working so hard.

{These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more. In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}

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A Doozy of a Discussion

4 / 14 / 1712 / 2 / 17

 

Have you struggled through the "death talk"; with your children? This post dives deep into letting the Holy Spirit guide your difficult conversations with your children.

Jessica
Jessica

Well, we survived that rough weekend with our dog almost passing away.  Thank God he’s doing so much better, but I’m looking back on the whole situation and I’m questioning how we handled it with John.  I could tell his almost-four-year-old mind was struggling to comprehend what was going on and process it all.

Jessica
Laura
Laura

Oh goodness!  I’m sure the poor little guy had more than a few questions.  My “favorite” question about death came from Jesse came when he was 3: “Mommy, when you put me in the ground, will you be sad?”  I’m was like, I’m sorry, what?  WHEN I put you in the ground? I was so caught off guard!  All the answers I tried to give him were obviously not what he was wanting to hear because he kept asking the same question!  

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

Oh my gosh – that’s nerve-rattling! ?  I’m at a loss myself! He could see that we were obviously upset and crying, and we explained that our dog was very sick and he may not come home.  I could tell this was causing John to become very quiet and concerned.  He started asking questions like,  “But we can just go get another dog, right?”  and “When is he going to die?”

Jessica
Laura
Laura

What did you say?

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

Luckily our dog got better so I just kind of brushed it under the rug because I had NO idea what to say! ?  It’s obvious that John was trying to process it all, and eventually the day will come where we will face a death of a loved one. So help me out – how do I talk to my kids about death??

Jessica
Laura
Laura

I know it’s uncomfortable, but talking to them about something like this is important. When Jesse asked me that question, he was processing some deep thoughts that I had no idea a three-year-old could even understand.  So I think the first thing to keep in mind is that they are able to talk about this (and other hard to understand things).  So don’t be afraid to open up to him.

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

Great points.  I know I don’t always give my kids enough credit for what they are able to comprehend.  

Jessica
Laura
Laura

I think that the hardest part for me was trying to figure out what Jesse wanted to know.  Why did he ask me that question?  I had to think about everything he had been experiencing recently to know why he asked that question in that way.  

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

I hadn’t even thought about digging deeper into the meaning. It could be that they want reassurance, or things explained in a different way to gain understanding, or just to know they are loved.  

Jessica
Laura
Laura

That’s exactly it!  And that’s exactly what Jesse wanted to know.  He needed to know that I loved him, that his daddy loved him.  And guess what? He really NEEDED to know that his Heavenly Father LOVES him always.

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

But man, in those tense moments of questions catching me off guard, or when my mind goes blank on how to respond, how do I find the right words to say?

Jessica
Laura
Laura

Pray and then trial and error!  Every child is different, but in these moments what you have is a wide open door as his mom to teach him the most important truth of all.  Even if it does take few different answers over a few different days to figure this out! I do not want to limit what I tell my kids about “scary” stuff like death because I think he can’t understand it.  The Holy Spirit is at work and is way smarter than I am!

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

I definitely get a little tense thinking about having these conversations, but maybe that’s a good thing.  It shows I have room to grow as I work out the feelings I have toward death.  It also shows that the Holy Spirit can do some work in me and through me, especially as I try to make it understandable for my four-year-old.

Jessica
Laura
Laura

You know, this could be the first open door to his little heart becoming aware of what he really needs: Jesus.  These first conversation about death aren’t easy, but try to embrace it.  Let it lead to more questions.  One day, sadly, your furbaby really will die.  And all of you really will be terribly sad.  Terribly.  Let the Spirit lead you in those conversations.  

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

Thanks for the reminder to embrace it all – even the tough parts of life.

Jessica
Laura
Laura

This is not easy, but because of what Jesus did for us on Easter, we can grieve with hope! I know we are talking about a dog in this case, but it is a great example of how you will grieve a person.  How do you cope with the loss?  You rely on the One who made and loves you.

Laura
Jessica
Jessica

Yes to all of that! ? God calls us to have “child-like faith”.  If I can approach this all with the heart of a child and invite the Holy Spirit to guide our conversations, maybe I will be taught a thing or two about death and Jesus and God as well?!  This is all great stuff to keep in mind as Easter approaches. We can process death with the hope of heaven because Jesus made that possible.

Jessica

Soaking in the Truth

Scripture to encourage you:

  • “Don’t let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me. There is more than enough room in my Father’s home. If this were not so, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you?  When everything is ready, I will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where I am.  And you know the way to where I am going.” (John 14: 1-4, NLT)
  • “The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength. He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name. Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid,  for you are close beside me.  Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me.” (Psalm 23: 1-4, NLT)
  • “And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died. We tell you this directly from the Lord: We who are still living when the Lord returns will not meet him ahead of those who have died. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First, the believers who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. Then we will be with the Lord forever. So encourage each other with these words.” (1 Thessalonians 4: 13-18)

Music to inspire you:

  • Remember the Empty Grave by Passion
  • Glorious Day by Casting Crowns

Readings to come alongside of you:

  • “But in reality, there’s no escaping it:  every one of us will face difficulty, pressure, grief, pain.  Where will we turn in those moments?  The happy people are the free people.  The happy people are the ones who aren’t addicted to this world, whose hope is in heaven.  The happy people are the ones who don’t fear losing anything on earth because their hope isn’t here.  The happy people are the ones who taste suffering and know that Jesus is enough.  The happy people are the ones who need God and have God!”  Jennie Allen, Nothing to Prove
  • How to Help Your Child Grieve by Candy Arrington
  • Talking to Children about Death by HospiceNet
  • It’s Not How you Start.  It’s How you Finish.  By Sharon Jaynes

Living Out the Truth

Ideas to try:

  • When your kids start asking tough questions, it’s ok to tell them you need a moment to think and to step away from the conversation.  Take that moment to pray and invite the Holy Spirit into your conversation.  The prayer can be as simple as, “Holy Spirit, I invite you to join our conversation and guide the words that I speak.”

 

{These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more.  In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}

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