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Exiting the Worry Train

2 / 7 / 20

I’ve been struggling with an overactive mind recently. Well, recently isn’t totally accurate because honestly, it’s been a lifelong struggle. But some times are worse than others and recently it’s been more of a battle.

 

Take for instance, flu season. About a month ago, I read a couple of horrible stories of children dying from the flu and I started feeling myself stress out about the what-ifs with my own family. I could feel myself going into overdrive to protect them from the flu. We were washing hands like crazy, putting hand sanitizer on when we got in the car, taking every vitamin I could think of, trying to get to bed early…you name it, I was on it. 

 

And then one day, I noticed my oldest was acting uncharacteristically lethargic. And the panic began to rise in my mind. Oh my gosh, she has the flu. And then my next thought: What if she doesn’t recover from this? I hopped on the crazy train faster than I realized what was happening. The train left the building and my thoughts careened down the tracks to Irrational Land.

 

As my daughter’s fever spiked to 103, I realized I had a choice. I could be on-edge every day praying she would recover, or I could choose to grab these thoughts that were stealing my joy and redirect them.

 

I wouldn’t say I did an amazing job of guarding my thoughts during my girls’ week-long sickness but now that we made it through the virus and my girls are back to school, I’ve had some time to think about it. 

 

I’ve traveled to Irrational Land many times in my life, and even more times as a mother. (Case in point: http://textingthetruth.com/2017/03/finding-peace-in-panic/) I can take a seemingly innocent situation and go to the worst-scenario amazingly fast. Some days I’m much better at catching my thoughts than others.

 

But what I am learning is I have to interrupt my thoughts before they start heading down the tracks. I’m learning that talking to myself harshly about my crazy thoughts never works. Instead, I’m trying to gently talk to myself like I would talk to my daughter when she is struggling.

 

Instead of saying to myself, “You are so crazy. Stop having such dumb thoughts,” I’m trying to be a lot more gentle. Something like, “I know it’s scary that she has the flu and you can’t control what will happen. What can you do right now?”

 

I’m learning to be gentle with myself and interrupt my fear-filled thoughts with truth. I take great comfort that David did this in the Bible too. In Psalm 42, he says, “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God. My soul is downcast within me therefore I will remember you…” (Psalm 42:5,6) and he goes on to remember the ways God has met him in the past.

 

When I am struggling with anxious thoughts, interrupting them, and remembering the way God has provided for me in the past helps me slow the worry train down.

 

Anna and Laura talked about their anxious-thought-cycle in our Monday post as well. (Link in profile.) It was so good for me to read it again and remind myself of so much good truth about what to do when the thought train starts chugging along.

 

I’d love to hear from you. What helps you when your worry thoughts start to take over?

 

What if today instead of letting our irrational thoughts steal our joy, we turn our thoughts back to God and put our hope in Him just like Psalms 42 says?

 

~Michelle

#textingthetruthblog #worry #anxiety #worrytrain #hopeinGod #realmomsrealgrace

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Moms in Progress: Katie Duh

2 / 5 / 202 / 4 / 20

Jo

Hey, Katie! It is your turn to update us on your life. One way to peek into each other’s hearts is to talk about one of my favorite ways to relax: MOVIES! What is your favorite movie?

Katie

Oh, it’s an old one, but I have always loved “Ever After.” Sweet and romantic, but with a good, strong woman as the main character. And some funny one-liners thrown in. I haven’t watched it in years, though. We don’t watch many movies these days, and when we do it’s usually more along the lines of Toy Story 4 or Frozen 2.?

Jo

That is such a good pick!! The acting in the movie was so good, too. My favorite throwback might have to be “Hope Floats.” Ok, next question about favorite pastimes: Read any good books lately?

Katie

I’ve always loved to read, but for the first several years after having kids I struggled to find any time to keep up with reading – aside from picture books.? And when I did find time to read, it was mostly parenting books. (My favorite is still Give them Grace: Dazzling Your Kids with the Love of Jesus by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson.) Just recently, I’ve begun making an effort to read fiction for my own enjoyment again. A friend recommended Before We Were Yours by Lisa Wingate a few months ago – and I loved it! I’m currently rereading the Harry Potter series in order to keep up in conversations with my son about the books.?

Jo

Wow, those are good recommendations, Katie. I have not read that parenting book, but I am a HUGE Harry Potter fan! And honestly, I am so inspired by Mrs. Weasley’s parenting style. Talk about a mama bear in the best sense of the word.

Katie

So true!

Jo

Since we are in the middle of winter now, I wonder … do you have any favorite seasonal winter treats?

Katie

Chocolate peppermint anything! Peppermint hot cocoa, chocolate mint chip cookies, mint chocolate candies … yum!

Jo

I know what to send you for a care package — mint! That is so refreshing to hear, just like your fresh personality and sense of humor, Katie. Next, let’s go a little deeper. What’s on your heart right now?

Katie

This school year has been a little rocky for me and my kids. Three of my four kids are school-aged now, and between the three of them, we’ve had 12 different classes and teachers over the years. This is our first year ever with any school issues, so we have really been very blessed with wonderful school experiences! But, this year has been hard.

Jo

Ugh — so hard! My son just started elementary school, and it is SO much to navigate. Would you share a few specifics with us?

Katie

Some of the challenges have been logistical. A couple weeks before school started, our district changed my Kindergartner’s school building assignment – meaning my kids are at three different schools this year. But more significantly, one of my children’s educational needs have not been met the way I think they should be or the way school staff promised they would be at the beginning of the school year.

Jo

I know you are advocating for your child. Making sure you are the “squeaky wheel” in a respectful way is key — the school system has so much to consider, and unless parents speak up, they cannot make adjustments to keep doing what is best for kids. How is that playing out at home? I bet there is a lot of heartbreak for you all.

Katie

It’s been tough. For the first time ever, my son now says he doesn’t like school. That breaks my heart!? And another one of my children this year has a teacher with a very different teaching style than my own (as a former teacher, I will admit I can be a little picky).

Jo

I understand! I am picky too. I have lots of empathy, especially since I am still working in the school system, but I am still not going to back down on my high expectations. Different is not always bad, but we have to pray and discern what needs our attention and what we can accept.

Katie

Exactly! It’s been a struggle for me all year to figure out when I need to speak up and advocate for my kids and when I need to let go. We all learn a lot from imperfect and challenging situations in life. My kids have and will continue to grow from their experiences this year! At the same time, of course, my husband and I want to make the best possible decisions for our children’s education. Let’s just say, this year has been filled with lots of prayers ? for wisdom!

Jo

Whew. Ephesians 3:20 comes to mind, which reminds me that He can do “far above what I can ask or imagine.” Lord, help us trust you with our children and provide far above what we try to control. 

Well, let’s switch to a lighter topic. I hope this does not add more stress, LOL. So, Katie, which room in your house is the messiest right now?

Katie

Ugh. Truthfully, every room. Clutter is a constant battle in our house. Our master bedroom is probably the worst at the moment. Everything seems to be thrown in there to get it out of the way and deal with it later, but later never seems to arrive.?

Jo

Same! We have really busted our butts trying to get ready for our home visit for foster/adoption licensure, so it is better than it WAS, but it is not where it NEEDS to be yet. Plus, it’s like Tetris – you clear one row and another one starts floating down right away. 

Alright, Katie – last but probably the most important question of the day.  What is your favorite verse of scripture right now? Why?

Katie

I have always loved Psalm 46 and Psalm 91. You and Virginia recently wrote a text conversation about helping our kids through their fears and anxieties. I was often fearful as a child. When I was in grade school I memorized several verses from Psalm 46 and 91 and would recite them over and over in my mind when I felt anxious. Now as an adult, when I feel worries start to set in, I return to these same verses. I even have a wall hanging of Psalm 46:1 by my kitchen table as a constant reminder (which I made during one of my church’s moms group meetings?). 

 

Jo

That wall hanging is absolutely beautiful, Katie. So much of the scripture we hid in our hearts as kids continues to bless us as women and moms. I pray my son starts to memorize some verses soon. My God-sighting this week was him getting the LAST spot at a VERY small after school care program at a church, and their scripture art in the hallways is very inspiring. Filling our homes with the Word of God is so important to encourage our families! Any other favorites?

Katie

I also love Galatians 6:9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Seems especially encouraging in the midst of day-to-day motherhood struggles when the “harvest” sometimes seems a long way off.

Jo

Absolutely, Katie — I pray you hang onto the promise of the harvest with all of the school struggles this year especially. When the harvest seems far away, we can rest in the promises before us and the stories from our past where God has already been faithful to see us through. Katie, I am so thankful for your whimsy, your honesty, and your vulnerability as a writer.  And as for all we shared in this MiP, I did find one last quote of encouragement for us. In the words of J.K. Rowling in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, “It is important to fight and fight again, and keep fighting, for only then can evil be kept at bay though never quite eradicated.”

Do you have a story to tell? Would you like to be featured in a future Moms in Progress post?  Just click here and answer a few questions to share the details of your story. We will do the rest!

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