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Tag Archives: let go

When Mom Feels Anxious

2 / 5 / 182 / 5 / 18

Michelle
Michelle

Ugh. I feel so anxious today! ?

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Uh-oh. I’m so sorry, friend. ? What’s going on?

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

Well, I think it was a combo of sleepless nights due to #flumaggedon, full days tending to sick kids, and a traveling hubby for the week. I feel spent. ?

Michelle
Desi
Desi

That would take anyone down.

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

Really? I so appreciate you saying that because I think sometimes I can put too much pressure on myself to handle things and be the strong one all the time. And I feel like I failed at that recently.

PS This is why it’s good for me to talk this out with you. Thanks for the validation that I’m not going crazy. ??

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Nope, you’re not crazy. (Well, maybe a little? )  But my heart hurts for you because I have been there! It is SO hard when it seems like everything is going wrong and all the little things start snowballing until, before you know it, you’re angry and yelling at everyone.  

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

You too?? I think sometimes I can get so caught up in my internal battle that I take it out on the people closest to me.

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Yes…so much yes. ? But you know what I learned about anger? Counselors will tell you that it’s a secondary emotion – meaning that often when we’re experiencing anger, there’s actually a deeper feeling going on.

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

I have heard that too. Should I be paying you for this conversation?

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Ha! Well, I’m not licensed yet, so this one is free. ?

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

? But seriously, I think that is a good point. A lot of my anxiety stems from wishing certain things were different and feeling like they are never going to change.

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Whew…I know what you mean. It makes you start to feel like you’re sinking into this black hole and nothing is going to get you out of it. I think I’ve experienced this many times in my life…especially since becoming a mother!

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

Yes! Not to mention how all of the hormones that can mess with us during this time…

Michelle
Desi
Desi

? ? And then I get to where I feel so completely overwhelmed but I don’t know why. I start telling myself that I just need to pray more or have an actual quiet time with God. Or maybe I just need to force myself to go out with people or… on and on with all the things I SHOULD be doing to get over the depression and move on.

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

Right, when really, maybe you just needed to stop putting so much pressure on yourself?! Preaching to myself here.  ?

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Exactly. Why do we do that? I so often live in this mentality of “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” when I’m depressed. But I’m learning that what I really need is to give myself some grace.

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

That’s so interesting you said that. Today I was praying and felt like God was saying, “Just let go. Stop trying to figure it out. Stop trying to be what everyone needs. Give yourself the grace I already have given you.” ?

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Tears.? Seriously…just brought tears to my eyes. When I read that I suddenly realized how tightly I have been trying to hold on to everything. My MO when I’m anxious or depressed is to fall into this mentality that says it is up to ME to fix everything and everyone (including myself), and that is such a lonely place to be (which only adds to the depression). ?

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

I can relate. When I get anxious, I think my MO is to get discouraged and overwhelmed, feeling like I’m always going to feel like this. And I KNOW that is not true but those hopeless thoughts can feel really suffocating. And I keep thinking, “How did I end up back here again?”

Michelle
Desi
Desi

I know what you mean. But do you know what is so encouraging to me and something I cling to? That God has ALWAYS pulled me through in the past and He will do it this time too. He is so so faithful.

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

Yes, yes, and yes. Recently God’s been reminding me that instead of trying to just “fix” myself and get it it together, to invite Him into it all. And ask Him to help me hear the truth I need.

Michelle
Desi
Desi

YES. I need that reminder that God isn’t shaking His head wishing I would figure it out already, but He’s sitting there, letting me lean in to Him and reminding me that I can let go because He’s got this.

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

I need to plaster this truth to my forehead during these anxious times.

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Plaster? Heck, I’m thinking tattoo! Shall I make us a tattoo appointment? ? ?

Desi
Michelle
Michelle

HAHA.YES! I have to say, it feels good to laugh. Thanks for talking through this with me today. I think I feel a little lighter.

Michelle
Desi
Desi

Anytime, my friend. You always do the same for me. ?

Desi

Soaking in the Truth

Scripture to encourage you:

  • “I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” (Psalm 27:13-14, NIV)
  • “You will keep in perfect peace, those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in You.” (Isaiah 26:3, NIV) 
  • “Why, my soul, are you downcast?  Why so disturbed within me?  Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” (Psalm 42:5, NIV)
  • “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.” (Psalm 143:8, NIV)

Music to inspire you:

  • Matt Redman Gracefully Broken 
  • Meredith Andrews  Not for a Moment (After All)
  • Kari Jobe Here
  • Sara Groves You’ve Always Been Faithful

Readings and Resources to come alongside of you:

  • When You’re Still Suffering by Shana Garcia
  • Living With Anxiety by Jamie Patrick 
  • Dear Mom Battling Anxiety by Jessica Smartt

Related Posts on Texting The Truth:

  • Warmth in the Winter

Living Out the Truth

Ideas to try:

  • When I am anxious, my body usually shows me signs. Like I can’t catch my breath or my muscles are really tight. I feel like those are invitations for me to slow down and take care of myself—whether that’s a long shower, an early bedtime time, etc.– to do something that energizes and refreshes me.
  • Music has a way of lifting my spirit and reminding me of the truth about God—that He has come through in the past and He will again. Take a few minutes to listen to the songs above and soak up the truth.
  • We really believe in good self care like we’ve mentioned above. Good exercise, nutrition, supplements are all really important for your whole body. We suggest you google “gut and brain connection” for some information on how these two are related and what you can do to help both your gut and mental health.
  • Find a trusted friend or counselor to listen and help you sort out some of the issues you may be dealing with. Sometimes a good listening ear can be so helpful when dealing with anxiety or depression.
  • Pick a Bible verse that reminds you of God’s faithfulness or care and memorize it. I like to put it on my bathroom mirror or above the kitchen sink so I’m continually reminded of it. When I’m feeling anxious or depressed, I quote the verse over and over to myself. If you need some help, the verses above are a good place to start.

Treasured Products we love:

Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow

{These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more. In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}

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Mom Win Wednesday: Emily Wheeler

12 / 6 / 1712 / 6 / 17

Michelle
Michelle

Today I am so excited that we are featuring Emily Wheeler. We went to college together but didn’t know each other very well.  Over the years since college, our circles keep crossing and it’s been so fun! I love what I know about her and I can’t wait for her to share more with us today.

Michelle
Emily

Hello! This photo was taken this fall in downtown Indianapolis where we live.

My husband Dennis and I were biking with the boys to the YMCA, where they spend one Saturday night/month for a Kids Night Out (read: date night for us!) We decided to ride our bikes for our night out, from one restaurant/venue to the next. It was one of our favorite date/family nights of the year!

Michelle
Michelle

Aw, I love that! And I love that you live close enough that you can ride your bikes. What a fun adventure for your family and then a bonus night for you and Dennis! ☺️

Do you wear any other hats in addition to your [big, gigantic, hugely significant] Mom Hat?  

Michelle
Emily
 I work part-time for a really fun group of real estate agents in Indianapolis, doing administrative work.
Laura
Laura

I’m sure you are such a gift to them! So tell us about your kids. I know that we gave birth to our babies around the same time. ?

Laura
Emily

I’m a mom to 2 boys, Henry and Hudson. Henry is “4 and three-quarters” and is my child who likes to know the plan for each day, and makes sure it is executed down to the minute. He is my son who wears his heart on his sleeve and is quick to say “I love you.” Hudson is 2 and has a will of steel. He is reserved around others, and shines brightest at home. They have just recently entered a new season as brothers where they play together like friends. I never thought the day would come, and it has been a sweet gift.

Michelle
Michelle

Well, I basically could say the same thing about each of my girls! Also, the thought just popped in my mind that maybe we could arrange for them to marry?  I would love her to you as her mother-in-law! ? But on second thought, maybe it wouldn’t be a good idea because they would be too similar of pairs. ? HA.

What is a recent mom win you experienced that took time and perseverance to accomplish?

Michelle
Emily

Decorating for Christmas has always been something I’ve done alone and really enjoy. This year, my 4 year old wanted to be involved in every aspect of decorating, from choosing the tree to stringing the lights, to hanging EACH ornament. It took twice as long with him as it would have without, but it felt really good to complete it with him, and his delight was infectious.

Michelle
Michelle

That is so sweet and such an amazing mom win because I know how hard it is to push down your need to get it done and just let yourself embrace the moment together.  That is a constant struggle for me and so yay for you for listening to God’s nudges and enjoying that sweet time with Henry.

So tell me, what is a mom win that you would text your best friend?

Michelle
Emily
I made dinner tonight that didn’t include something (or everything) from my freezer. ?
Michelle
Michelle

Wow, I mean, first of all – you MADE dinner. That’s a mom win right there in my book. ?

I’ve loved all you’ve shared about motherhood. What would you say  you are learning as a mom right now?

Michelle
Emily

I’m learning that how I respond to my boys in difficult moments MATTERS. Sometimes when we are in the thick of a stressful interaction (i.e. my 2 yo is biting my 4 yo, or my 4 yo is hitting my 2 yo), I can give myself the license to lose my cool, in hopes that it will elicit a desired response. I’ve really seen how when I choose to react, it does not produce any fruit in the hearts of my children. This is still a lesson I’m learning- heart over behavior.

Michelle
Michelle

Oh girl, I am RIGHT THERE with you. That has probably been my biggest struggle since becoming a mom. I have been praying that God would help me RESPOND to my girls instead of REACT. When I react, it doesn’t go well for anyone. My blood pressure escalates, my girls usually cry because my reaction was strong, and then there are actually more meltdowns. When I can take a minute and slow my response and ask God how I should respond, and then do so in a Spirit-filled way, it goes so much better. I hear you for sure and I am a work in progress on this reaction vs. responding shift as well.

Thank you so much for sharing your heart with us today! ?

Michelle

If you would like to be featured or you know someone who would, please contact us here!

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We don’t claim to have motherhood figured out. Actually quite the opposite. We’re a group of women who first and foremost love the Lord and want to honor Him with our lives and talents. And we decided that what better way for us to sort out this beautiful and messy thing called motherhood but to process it together in text messages? Our prayer is that as we share our real-life stories and honest experiences, every mom who visits our blog will receive tangible truth and experience real grace.

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