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Tag Archives: Mom Fail

Moms in Progress: Anna Brink

6 / 26 / 196 / 25 / 19

Virginia

This month we’re excited to share an update from one of our writers, Anna Brink. Anna, could you tell us a little about your family and share a recent photo with us?

Anna
Anna


Yes! This is a rare family photo taken on our recent vacation in front of a Yellowstone waterfall. My husband, Ryan, and I have been married for 18 years (in about 2 weeks!), and we have three kids: Bella (12, almost 13), Tristan (9), and Tabitha (6). Ryan is a computer specialist and project manager, and our kids are into theater, baseball, dance, golf, and our puppy, Willow. In addition to writing, I am a substitute teacher in my kids’ schools and I’m going back to directing musicals in the fall!
Here’s our puppy:

Anna
Virginia

Cute! So, Anna, would you share a truth you heard this week that really impacted you? It could have been from a podcast, quote, song, or conversation.

Anna
Anna

Now that summer is here, some days have been really tough. The kids are home all the time which can lead to boredom or conflict between siblings but also good times together like our recent vacation. It’s been good but yesterday was just really long. I read a blog post and this quote stood out to me: “Don’t compromise your convictions for acceptance.” I realized that a lot of my stress was coming from trying to make everyone happy all of the time. When everyone wasn’t happy, I was frustrated! I started to ask myself, what are my convictions about everything: How do we spend our summer time? What do I want the kids to be doing? How do I want to spend my time? Do I want them to help around the house? How do I want them to eat?
Once I sat down and thought these things out, I realized how much I needed to realize and then communicate my convictions, and then lay out my expectations to the kids. And then hold them accountable! Not just try to make everyone happy all the time (except me!) — which doesn’t work anyway!

Anna
Virginia

Well, I agree it is impossible to make everyone happy! What is your hardest parenting struggle currently?

Anna
Anna

Navigating the new waters of teenagerhood with my oldest. My husband, Ryan, and I are trying to find that delicate balance between rules and relationship. We’re working on discerning how much to let go and chalk it up to hormones, and where to draw the line and lean in.

Anna
Virginia

That is tough. It’s probably different for each family. On a more positive note, what is going well?

Anna
Anna

We are having a lot of adventures together, and this has been really helpful in connecting as a family. We recently went to Yellowstone National Park and did everything from white water rafting (a first for all of us except my husband), panning for gold (during which there was a golf-ball-sized hail storm), finding wild animals (5 bears), and going on hikes (with snakes!). I will say that there were times when we would start on an adventure and one of the kids would whine or complain: “I don’t want to do this! I want to stay in the car!” We just ignored it and kept going. When we got back to the car, they were almost always all smiles.

Anna
Virginia

That’s great news! It’s easy to see the tough parts but there are good things to find when we look. What else would you like to add?

Anna
Anna

With your teens and pre-teens, try not to let their moodiness rock you too much. (I know, easier said than done but you will get the hang of it.) When we were on one of the above adventures (it was the Battlefield of Little Bighorn), one of my children complained the entire time. It was too hot, too boring, too battlefield-y… We ignored said child and cheerfully enjoyed the experience the best we could. When we got home, I overheard her telling her grandma ALL ABOUT how interesting it was. WHAT?!? So, stay the course, mommas. Stay the course.

Anna
Virginia

What is your least favorite household chore (which one would you pay someone else to do for you)?

Anna
Anna

LAUNDRY. 100%. I often joke with my friends that I’ll do their dishes if they’ll do my laundry. I don’t mind dishes.

Anna
Virginia

I will trade with you!

Why not end this interview with your most embarrassing mom fail?

Anna
Anna

There are so many… Haha. I once threw my daughter a sleepover birthday party with way too many girls and it ended in disaster. I’ve had Sleepover PTSD ever since.? Just earlier today I accidentally knocked my youngest in the nose with my elbow, causing a major nose bleed. Ugh. I mean the truth is, we all fail. We are human. Give yourself a little grace every day!

Anna

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Raising Generous Kids

11 / 20 / 1711 / 19 / 17

Anna
Anna

Well, my plan FAILED again! ?

Anna
Laura
Laura

Oh, no… what happened? You know what they say about the best laid plans, right?

Laura
Anna
Anna

Yes…ugh. I am SO frustrated with my kids right now. I wanted to start off the holiday season with giving, instead of making a huge list of everything they want for Christmas (when they need nothing. I mean, we need no more stuff in this house!).

Anna
Laura
Laura

I hear you on all points! How do we focus on giving? How do we focus on gratitude instead of greediness? And seriously… the stuff? It’s a little out of control!

Laura
Anna
Anna

Right?! So my plan was to show them an Operation Christmas Child video, talk to them about children in other places who don’t have what they have, and then give them each a box to fill. So we did that, we went to the store together, and what do they do? Ask me for stuff — “Mom, can I have this? Mom, I have $10 at home, will you buy this for me? I’ll pay you back!” ?

Anna
Laura
Laura

I wish you could hear me laughing/crying right now… It’s not really funny, of course, but it’s comical because it’s normal. Sad and typical of our kids who have more than they know!  

Laura
Anna
Anna

Yeah, I think I said “THIS IS NOT FOR YOU!” about 15 times. #notaspecialmoment

Anna
Laura
Laura

But it’s such a good goal you had here! And it seems the purpose was lost on them, but maybe it wasn’t?

Laura
Anna
Anna

Maybe… They just didn’t seem like their hearts were in it. Even when we got home and were packing the boxes, I felt like they were doing it to please me. Was it worth anything? It makes me sad because I don’t want them to be entitled kids.

Anna
Laura
Laura

Me either! But even if they packed those boxes to please you, they still did it. They still will be able to track that box all the way to wherever it goes (if you paid the extra $9, that is!?)  

Laura
Anna
Anna

We totally did pay the extra $9, and my hope was still that if they could see where it went, it would become a little more real.

Anna
Laura
Laura

You have to start somewhere!

Laura
Anna
Anna

(Sigh.) I guess you are right. As a mom you just hope and pray that something sinks in, even though you can’t tell sometimes. At least not yet. I guess I can’t expect this one big attempt at giving to instantly give them generous, thankful hearts.

Anna
Laura
Laura

Yes. We have a tough job here. In so many ways we want our kids to be normal, and sometimes I feel like it’s my fault that my boys are so entitled. After all, I have helped fill our house with the stuff.  

Laura
Anna
Anna

Me too… And on the other hand, we’re not “normal” — or shouldn’t be. We have a great gift that changes us: Jesus. And because of that, He asks us to live a little differently from the “norm.”

Anna
Laura
Laura

So true. I’m so glad that we can work together as moms to figure out how to do this. How do we raise thankful kids? Grateful kids? Kids who want what they want because they’re kids, but who also pack boxes for kids who want for what we take for granted? Kids who know what the greatest gift is and are ready at all times to give that away. #thetruthaboutgrowingup

Laura
Anna
Anna

I think we can just pray to be more aware of opportunities on a daily basis…to be on the lookout for those times when we can be generous in small ways. Lots of small things over time could add up to a lot. And hey… by the way, I think we’re doing at least some of that already. So maybe I can chill out a little. ?

Anna
Laura
Laura

Um, yes! You and your kids did a wonderful thing for others. You did it with a heart that pleases God. And you know how much you have to be thankful even if they don’t… yet! Have a great Thanksgiving, dear friend!

Laura

Soaking in the Truth

Scripture to encourage you:

  • “Then the people rejoiced because they had offered so willingly, for they made their offering to the Lord with a whole heart…” 1 Chronicles 29:9
  • “Give, and it will be given to you.” Luke 6:38
  • “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Acts 20:35

Music to inspire you:

  • “Give Thanks” originally by Don Moen, performed here by Unhindered

Readings and Resources to come alongside of you:

  • “The Generous Child: How to Teach Generosity, Ages 3 to 4” by The Baby Center
  • “Top 5 Ways to Raise a Generous Child at Any Age” by World Vision 
  • (An interesting read) “How to Raise Kinder, Less Entitled Kids (According to Science)” by the Washington Post

Related Posts on Texting the Truth:

  • “Decluttering Our Spiritual Closets”
  • “The Real Stuffing”

Living Out the Truth

Ideas to try:

  • Look for opportunities to show generosity, and take your kids with you when you can! Make dinner for a neighbor who just had surgery, and ask your child to help prepare or deliver it. Offer to give a friend a ride home in front of your child. Take extra clothing or canned goods to a local food pantry with your child. Make it a regular occurrence (not just during the holidays).
  • Use the word “generous” when you talk about the above things, so they get used to hearing it and thinking about it.
  • Share 1 thing that you are thankful for at dinner or bedtime. This helps to get the heart in the right place. Thankfulness prepares the heart to give.
  • Offer to share with little ones, and praise them when they share with you or siblings.

    {These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more.
    In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}

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We don’t claim to have motherhood figured out. Actually quite the opposite. We’re a group of women who first and foremost love the Lord and want to honor Him with our lives and talents. And we decided that what better way for us to sort out this beautiful and messy thing called motherhood but to process it together in text messages? Our prayer is that as we share our real-life stories and honest experiences, every mom who visits our blog will receive tangible truth and experience real grace.

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