Tag Archives: self-control

3 Exercises for Your Self-Control Muscle

In Monday’s post, Anna shares John Piper’s acronym, A.P.T.A.T. which stands for Admit, Pray, Trust, Act, Thank. Did you notice that 4 out of 5 of those steps are all about relying on the Lord? We have our part to do as well: act.  Too often in the midst of a difficult situation, I sit there in defeat and say, “Lord, I just can’t” when what I actually need is to learn how to improve my level of self control. 

When I was a young professional, I had my own ways to handle money but I really had no plan. I lived on hope. I hoped I would have money at the end of the month. I even used birthday money for groceries one month, which did not please my mom who wrote the check. ? Since completing Dave Ramsey’s money management program, Financial Peace University in 2007, I have never gone back to my “no plan” plan again. 

Now that I’m a mom, I can model that self-control for my children, whether it’s with money or food or shopping. I say out loud, “No I’m not buying that for you. It’s not in our budget.” I’m grateful to impart that knowledge in the early years. Of course as preschoolers, they hear “no” throughout the day. Gradually they will come to understand, Oh, Mommy is telling herself no (to that donut or a 3rd pair of yoga pants) for a reason. Yes, it may take years for them to verbalize this realization but it’s still worth the extra effort now. 

In his book, The Motivation Myth, Jeff Haden offers up these suggestions to strengthen the self control bicep: 

 

  • Focus on the process. ? Focus only on regular, tiny adjustments. Forget the big goal. 
  • Develop small wins. ? While working on our debt, we were advised to get rid of the smallest debt first. That does not make sense financially but it does build the motivation to persevere with the process. 
  • Need less self control? Eliminate areas of temptation. 

 

If you want to improve your financial health, check out Dave Ramsey’s site to find an FPU class near you. ?

?Virginia

Reflecting on Self-Control

As summer is winding down, I find myself trying to fit fifteen gallons of water in a ten gallon bucket.? Isn’t it totally realistic for me to think I can schedule everyone’s doctor appointments, host company, read five books, make plans for work, AND completely declutter / prep for a yard sale before school starts? ✅ Oh, and I have to do the back-to-school shopping, so I am going to go ahead and pare that list way back.

Is there any hope in the hustle? In Anna’s post, Why My Self Control Wasn’t Enough  she dives into wisdom from John Piper and Chris Pratt on how to handle the urge to control and manage our lives. 

Rather than listing and going into turbo mode as we head into August, I am going to challenge myself to continue to accept GRACE over my perfectionism and self-control. Rather than trying to power through all the expectations (keep the house, prepare my son for school, maintain fitness goals, be all-around awesome at all times), I can try to apply John Piper’s method Anna wrote about in her post. We can find hope in the hustle when we pause to accept grace.☕️♥️ But how? 

Piper’s practical method called A.P.T.A.T. (“App-tat”) is a tool we might all be able to use as we brave back-to-school month. ?? Admitting who I am is an important first step (cue Lauren Daigle’s “You Say”). When I focus more on my identity rather than my roles, I find myself less worried about letting others’ down, because I am leading from a place of authenticity as me rather than the role itself. What if we let go of the airbrushed idea of Mom, Wife, Christian, Work Title, Friend??? Like Anna, I get steps Pray and Act, but there is so much more grace I am missing when I forget to Admit my identity before I pray. When I get the A step, I do find I can Trust a little easier before I jump into Action. I pray I can hang onto this promise from God during August: “Surely Your goodness and mercy will follow me ? all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever” (Psalm 23:6, NKJV). Where do you struggle in the A.P.T.A.T. cycle? Do you find it hard to Admit, or are you stuck on Action? Let us know in the comments so we can pray with you, Mamas.

☺️Jo 

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