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Tag Archives: summer

3 Exercises for Your Self-Control Muscle

8 / 9 / 19

In Monday’s post, Anna shares John Piper’s acronym, A.P.T.A.T. which stands for Admit, Pray, Trust, Act, Thank. Did you notice that 4 out of 5 of those steps are all about relying on the Lord? We have our part to do as well: act.  Too often in the midst of a difficult situation, I sit there in defeat and say, “Lord, I just can’t” when what I actually need is to learn how to improve my level of self control. 

When I was a young professional, I had my own ways to handle money but I really had no plan. I lived on hope. I hoped I would have money at the end of the month. I even used birthday money for groceries one month, which did not please my mom who wrote the check. ? Since completing Dave Ramsey’s money management program, Financial Peace University in 2007, I have never gone back to my “no plan” plan again. 

Now that I’m a mom, I can model that self-control for my children, whether it’s with money or food or shopping. I say out loud, “No I’m not buying that for you. It’s not in our budget.” I’m grateful to impart that knowledge in the early years. Of course as preschoolers, they hear “no” throughout the day. Gradually they will come to understand, Oh, Mommy is telling herself no (to that donut or a 3rd pair of yoga pants) for a reason. Yes, it may take years for them to verbalize this realization but it’s still worth the extra effort now. 

In his book, The Motivation Myth, Jeff Haden offers up these suggestions to strengthen the self control bicep: 

 

  • Focus on the process. ? Focus only on regular, tiny adjustments. Forget the big goal. 
  • Develop small wins. ? While working on our debt, we were advised to get rid of the smallest debt first. That does not make sense financially but it does build the motivation to persevere with the process. 
  • Need less self control? Eliminate areas of temptation. 

 

If you want to improve your financial health, check out Dave Ramsey’s site to find an FPU class near you. ?

?Virginia

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Moms in Progress: Laura Freytag

7 / 24 / 198 / 22 / 19

Virginia

Welcome to MiP Wednesday, Mamas! Today we’re featuring Laura Freytag, another fabulous Texting the Truth writer.

Laura, please tell us a little bit about yourself and share a family photo!

Laura
Laura

Hi everyone! This is our family picture from our most recent family vacation. For being 97 degrees and a heat index in the triple digits, we look pretty good!

Laura
Virginia

What a cute family pic!

What truth have you heard this week that has helped you?

Laura
Laura

I’ve been doing the First 5 study of Acts this summer. It’s an older study, but I wanted to re-read Acts to prepare for BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) this fall. Anyway, I’ve been struck with the power of the Spirit. That same power that filled those early believers fills me. It’s been helping me to ask in prayer for the power to have self-control in my areas of weakness (eating, exercising, patience).

Laura
Virginia

That’s awesome! We could all use more of that power.

What’s your hardest parenting struggle currently?

Laura
Laura

I have been very short of patience lately. My boys are so loud and they seem to not move unless I yell. I don’t like it. I don’t want to spend my summer days (or any other days) shouting. In the past I’ve yelled because I’ve wanted to be in control and I’ve tried to deal with that impulse. But this feels different, like a new layer of anger to deal with. I think the source of this anger is feeling like my words and opinions are not valued or respected. I find myself asking, “Am I talking out loud?” or “Am I invisible?” I’m still working on this, but I know that something needs to change.

Laura
Virginia

Laura, this was me six months ago! I know a lot of moms struggle feeling undervalued. I can tell you’re going to get at the root and work on it. Having the Holy Spirit’s power within you will help, big time!

Let’s focus on some good stuff. What is going well?

Laura
Laura

We are still pretty successfully using our sticker/stamp charts. As we get closer to the end of summer we are starting to decide what rewards will be given for the hard work. I am very glad that I have decided to teach the older boys some simple chores. They are learning to clean the bathroom sinks which is such a big help to me. And my oldest son’s personal goal was to learn to make his own breakfast. That is also a big help. I have enjoyed watching them take on new responsibilities.

Laura
Virginia

Way to go, mama! Your boys’ future wives will thank you as well! ?

What is your most embarrassing mom fail?

Laura
Laura

Ummm… There are so many. I think the one that stung the most came last summer when I had all 4 boys at Aldi with me. The boys weren’t exactly misbehaving, but they were being loud! We were looking at new lunch boxes and a plastic organizer for lunches to be packed in. I wanted to make sure that they could open each compartment on their own. So I was showing them how to open and close each one. How to put the water bottle in just right, and how to zip the lunch bag around the box. Anyway, they were excited, and we were definitely taking our half of the aisle out of the middle. We had already been in another shopper’s way once and we were clearly in his way again (because we were in everyone’s way). But he had no sympathy for this mother of 4 young boys. Then my youngest said something rude about him (not exactly to him, but we were being quite loud, remember). He said something like “Why is that man so fat?” Well this man heard it and he yelled at me that I should put my children in a zoo. That I was raising rude and disrespectful children. And that I should teach my children better manners, and that he deserved an apology from my 3 year old. He scared my boys so much that they flocked to me. I didn’t know what to say. It all happened so fast. I knew that when my youngest said that, I was thinking I was going to have him say he was sorry. But then when this man yelled at me I was so startled. I couldn’t think straight. And did my little boy really need to apologize to a 60 something man who was yelling at a mother in a grocery store? Anyway, the man went around the corner to the next row. We stayed where we were and all cried a little. It’s not like the store was that big, and I’m sure everyone heard him yelling at us. I was so embarrassed. Obviously that man was hurting and angry, but I did not handle the situation well. Later I wished I had spoken back to him and defended my boys better. But he hit a nerve in me. I always worry that my gaggle of boys is “too much” for people. And we are overwhelming. I do not have a wall flower in my bunch. But on the other hand, we are who we are. Sigh.

Laura
Virginia

You are who you are, and who God made y’all to be! Nothing wrong with that at all. You were gracious to give that guy some credit.

OK, one last question: What is your favorite summer activity to do as a family?

Laura
Laura

We have been spending a lot of time at the pool! Everyone is happy at the pool.

Laura
Virginia

Amen to that, sister! Laura, thank you so much for being with us today, and for writing on the blog (since the very beginning)! We are so glad you’re part of the team.

Laura
Laura

Thanks Virginia. This blog helps me to process life as a mom. Motherhood is not an easy job, but I love that my job is made easier by other moms around me experiencing the same struggles. I know that God is with us as we continue to make progress in each aspect of struggle and strength that He has built into our beings.

Laura

Do you have a story to tell? Would you like to be featured in a future Moms in Progress post?  Just click here (or the image above) and answer a few questions including the details of your story.  We will do the rest.

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We don’t claim to have motherhood figured out. Actually quite the opposite. We’re a group of women who first and foremost love the Lord and want to honor Him with our lives and talents. And we decided that what better way for us to sort out this beautiful and messy thing called motherhood but to process it together in text messages? Our prayer is that as we share our real-life stories and honest experiences, every mom who visits our blog will receive tangible truth and experience real grace.

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