Ugh. I feel so anxious today! ?
Uh-oh. I’m so sorry, friend. ? What’s going on?
Well, I think it was a combo of sleepless nights due to #flumaggedon, full days tending to sick kids, and a traveling hubby for the week. I feel spent. ?
That would take anyone down.
Really? I so appreciate you saying that because I think sometimes I can put too much pressure on myself to handle things and be the strong one all the time. And I feel like I failed at that recently.
PS This is why it’s good for me to talk this out with you. Thanks for the validation that I’m not going crazy. ??
Nope, you’re not crazy. (Well, maybe a little? ) But my heart hurts for you because I have been there! It is SO hard when it seems like everything is going wrong and all the little things start snowballing until, before you know it, you’re angry and yelling at everyone.
You too?? I think sometimes I can get so caught up in my internal battle that I take it out on the people closest to me.
Yes…so much yes. ? But you know what I learned about anger? Counselors will tell you that it’s a secondary emotion – meaning that often when we’re experiencing anger, there’s actually a deeper feeling going on.
I have heard that too. Should I be paying you for this conversation?
Ha! Well, I’m not licensed yet, so this one is free. ?
? But seriously, I think that is a good point. A lot of my anxiety stems from wishing certain things were different and feeling like they are never going to change.
Whew…I know what you mean. It makes you start to feel like you’re sinking into this black hole and nothing is going to get you out of it. I think I’ve experienced this many times in my life…especially since becoming a mother!
Yes! Not to mention how all of the hormones that can mess with us during this time…
? ? And then I get to where I feel so completely overwhelmed but I don’t know why. I start telling myself that I just need to pray more or have an actual quiet time with God. Or maybe I just need to force myself to go out with people or… on and on with all the things I SHOULD be doing to get over the depression and move on.
Right, when really, maybe you just needed to stop putting so much pressure on yourself?! Preaching to myself here. ?
Exactly. Why do we do that? I so often live in this mentality of “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” when I’m depressed. But I’m learning that what I really need is to give myself some grace.
That’s so interesting you said that. Today I was praying and felt like God was saying, “Just let go. Stop trying to figure it out. Stop trying to be what everyone needs. Give yourself the grace I already have given you.” ?
Tears.? Seriously…just brought tears to my eyes. When I read that I suddenly realized how tightly I have been trying to hold on to everything. My MO when I’m anxious or depressed is to fall into this mentality that says it is up to ME to fix everything and everyone (including myself), and that is such a lonely place to be (which only adds to the depression). ?
I can relate. When I get anxious, I think my MO is to get discouraged and overwhelmed, feeling like I’m always going to feel like this. And I KNOW that is not true but those hopeless thoughts can feel really suffocating. And I keep thinking, “How did I end up back here again?”
I know what you mean. But do you know what is so encouraging to me and something I cling to? That God has ALWAYS pulled me through in the past and He will do it this time too. He is so so faithful.
Yes, yes, and yes. Recently God’s been reminding me that instead of trying to just “fix” myself and get it it together, to invite Him into it all. And ask Him to help me hear the truth I need.
YES. I need that reminder that God isn’t shaking His head wishing I would figure it out already, but He’s sitting there, letting me lean in to Him and reminding me that I can let go because He’s got this.
I need to plaster this truth to my forehead during these anxious times.
Plaster? Heck, I’m thinking tattoo! Shall I make us a tattoo appointment? ? ?
HAHA.YES! I have to say, it feels good to laugh. Thanks for talking through this with me today. I think I feel a little lighter.
Anytime, my friend. You always do the same for me. ?
Soaking in the Truth
Scripture to encourage you:
- “I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.” (Psalm 27:13-14, NIV)
- “You will keep in perfect peace, those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in You.” (Isaiah 26:3, NIV)
- “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” (Psalm 42:5, NIV)
- “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.” (Psalm 143:8, NIV)
Music to inspire you:
- Matt Redman Gracefully Broken
- Meredith Andrews Not for a Moment (After All)
- Kari Jobe Here
- Sara Groves You’ve Always Been Faithful
Readings and Resources to come alongside of you:
- When You’re Still Suffering by Shana Garcia
- Living With Anxiety by Jamie Patrick
- Dear Mom Battling Anxiety by Jessica Smartt
Related Posts on Texting The Truth:
Living Out the Truth
Ideas to try:
- When I am anxious, my body usually shows me signs. Like I can’t catch my breath or my muscles are really tight. I feel like those are invitations for me to slow down and take care of myself—whether that’s a long shower, an early bedtime time, etc.– to do something that energizes and refreshes me.
- Music has a way of lifting my spirit and reminding me of the truth about God—that He has come through in the past and He will again. Take a few minutes to listen to the songs above and soak up the truth.
- We really believe in good self care like we’ve mentioned above. Good exercise, nutrition, supplements are all really important for your whole body. We suggest you google “gut and brain connection” for some information on how these two are related and what you can do to help both your gut and mental health.
- Find a trusted friend or counselor to listen and help you sort out some of the issues you may be dealing with. Sometimes a good listening ear can be so helpful when dealing with anxiety or depression.
- Pick a Bible verse that reminds you of God’s faithfulness or care and memorize it. I like to put it on my bathroom mirror or above the kitchen sink so I’m continually reminded of it. When I’m feeling anxious or depressed, I quote the verse over and over to myself. If you need some help, the verses above are a good place to start.
Treasured Products we love:
Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow
{These suggestions are ideas from novice moms. Sometimes our life situations need more. In that case, seeking out professional help is the right call.}
Oh girls. I so appreciate reading this, today! I feel like I’ve been fighting discouragement all. week. long. I loved what you said, Desi, about anger being a secondary emotion, and also Michelle, your sense that God wanted you to just let go and rest in His grace. This last week I was struck by the grammar of Romans 15:13- “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” God is the subject of this verse. God is the one who does the filling. God is responsible to bring the joy, peace, and hope. Our only job is to trust/ believe (depending on the translation). I LOVE THIS! It takes such pressure off that I don’t even have to manufacture positive emotions. I can simply rest in trusting that they will return because God is so very faithful. Anyway. Sorry for the rant. I’m so encouraged to have read this from you two!
I love this, Alyssa!! Thank you for sharing this great insight!