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Tag Archives: books

Moms in Progress: Katie Duh

2 / 5 / 202 / 4 / 20

Jo

Hey, Katie! It is your turn to update us on your life. One way to peek into each other’s hearts is to talk about one of my favorite ways to relax: MOVIES! What is your favorite movie?

Katie

Oh, it’s an old one, but I have always loved “Ever After.” Sweet and romantic, but with a good, strong woman as the main character. And some funny one-liners thrown in. I haven’t watched it in years, though. We don’t watch many movies these days, and when we do it’s usually more along the lines of Toy Story 4 or Frozen 2.?

Jo

That is such a good pick!! The acting in the movie was so good, too. My favorite throwback might have to be “Hope Floats.” Ok, next question about favorite pastimes: Read any good books lately?

Katie

I’ve always loved to read, but for the first several years after having kids I struggled to find any time to keep up with reading – aside from picture books.? And when I did find time to read, it was mostly parenting books. (My favorite is still Give them Grace: Dazzling Your Kids with the Love of Jesus by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson.) Just recently, I’ve begun making an effort to read fiction for my own enjoyment again. A friend recommended Before We Were Yours by Lisa Wingate a few months ago – and I loved it! I’m currently rereading the Harry Potter series in order to keep up in conversations with my son about the books.?

Jo

Wow, those are good recommendations, Katie. I have not read that parenting book, but I am a HUGE Harry Potter fan! And honestly, I am so inspired by Mrs. Weasley’s parenting style. Talk about a mama bear in the best sense of the word.

Katie

So true!

Jo

Since we are in the middle of winter now, I wonder … do you have any favorite seasonal winter treats?

Katie

Chocolate peppermint anything! Peppermint hot cocoa, chocolate mint chip cookies, mint chocolate candies … yum!

Jo

I know what to send you for a care package — mint! That is so refreshing to hear, just like your fresh personality and sense of humor, Katie. Next, let’s go a little deeper. What’s on your heart right now?

Katie

This school year has been a little rocky for me and my kids. Three of my four kids are school-aged now, and between the three of them, we’ve had 12 different classes and teachers over the years. This is our first year ever with any school issues, so we have really been very blessed with wonderful school experiences! But, this year has been hard.

Jo

Ugh — so hard! My son just started elementary school, and it is SO much to navigate. Would you share a few specifics with us?

Katie

Some of the challenges have been logistical. A couple weeks before school started, our district changed my Kindergartner’s school building assignment – meaning my kids are at three different schools this year. But more significantly, one of my children’s educational needs have not been met the way I think they should be or the way school staff promised they would be at the beginning of the school year.

Jo

I know you are advocating for your child. Making sure you are the “squeaky wheel” in a respectful way is key — the school system has so much to consider, and unless parents speak up, they cannot make adjustments to keep doing what is best for kids. How is that playing out at home? I bet there is a lot of heartbreak for you all.

Katie

It’s been tough. For the first time ever, my son now says he doesn’t like school. That breaks my heart!? And another one of my children this year has a teacher with a very different teaching style than my own (as a former teacher, I will admit I can be a little picky).

Jo

I understand! I am picky too. I have lots of empathy, especially since I am still working in the school system, but I am still not going to back down on my high expectations. Different is not always bad, but we have to pray and discern what needs our attention and what we can accept.

Katie

Exactly! It’s been a struggle for me all year to figure out when I need to speak up and advocate for my kids and when I need to let go. We all learn a lot from imperfect and challenging situations in life. My kids have and will continue to grow from their experiences this year! At the same time, of course, my husband and I want to make the best possible decisions for our children’s education. Let’s just say, this year has been filled with lots of prayers ? for wisdom!

Jo

Whew. Ephesians 3:20 comes to mind, which reminds me that He can do “far above what I can ask or imagine.” Lord, help us trust you with our children and provide far above what we try to control. 

Well, let’s switch to a lighter topic. I hope this does not add more stress, LOL. So, Katie, which room in your house is the messiest right now?

Katie

Ugh. Truthfully, every room. Clutter is a constant battle in our house. Our master bedroom is probably the worst at the moment. Everything seems to be thrown in there to get it out of the way and deal with it later, but later never seems to arrive.?

Jo

Same! We have really busted our butts trying to get ready for our home visit for foster/adoption licensure, so it is better than it WAS, but it is not where it NEEDS to be yet. Plus, it’s like Tetris – you clear one row and another one starts floating down right away. 

Alright, Katie – last but probably the most important question of the day.  What is your favorite verse of scripture right now? Why?

Katie

I have always loved Psalm 46 and Psalm 91. You and Virginia recently wrote a text conversation about helping our kids through their fears and anxieties. I was often fearful as a child. When I was in grade school I memorized several verses from Psalm 46 and 91 and would recite them over and over in my mind when I felt anxious. Now as an adult, when I feel worries start to set in, I return to these same verses. I even have a wall hanging of Psalm 46:1 by my kitchen table as a constant reminder (which I made during one of my church’s moms group meetings?). 

 

Jo

That wall hanging is absolutely beautiful, Katie. So much of the scripture we hid in our hearts as kids continues to bless us as women and moms. I pray my son starts to memorize some verses soon. My God-sighting this week was him getting the LAST spot at a VERY small after school care program at a church, and their scripture art in the hallways is very inspiring. Filling our homes with the Word of God is so important to encourage our families! Any other favorites?

Katie

I also love Galatians 6:9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Seems especially encouraging in the midst of day-to-day motherhood struggles when the “harvest” sometimes seems a long way off.

Jo

Absolutely, Katie — I pray you hang onto the promise of the harvest with all of the school struggles this year especially. When the harvest seems far away, we can rest in the promises before us and the stories from our past where God has already been faithful to see us through. Katie, I am so thankful for your whimsy, your honesty, and your vulnerability as a writer.  And as for all we shared in this MiP, I did find one last quote of encouragement for us. In the words of J.K. Rowling in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, “It is important to fight and fight again, and keep fighting, for only then can evil be kept at bay though never quite eradicated.”

Do you have a story to tell? Would you like to be featured in a future Moms in Progress post?  Just click here and answer a few questions to share the details of your story. We will do the rest!

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Let’s Chat with Katherine: The Power of Story for our Kids

3 / 2 / 193 / 3 / 19

The Power of a Story for our Kids

I’m excited to be here this month to share a great resource you didn’t even know you needed! You know that in the past few months I have shared some book reviews (click here and here to see those).

Let’s Chat with Katherine from The Comfort Table

But today I have something a little different for you.

If you have sons, you probably want to teach him things like honor, courage, character and honesty.  But, wanting to and actually doing it are two different things entirely.

I ran across this resource in teaching character to boys and I thought it was too good not to share. First, a little background…

Michael Gurian, author and educator

Michael Gurian is an author, family therapist and educator that has worked with school districts, families, churches and criminal justice agencies.  He has written extensively on child development and has written over ten books.  I heard him speak on this podcast and found his wisdom to be incredibly valuable.  He returned to Read Aloud Revival again to speak on the topic of girls and why listening to them is so incredibly important.

Through these podcasts, I wanted to learn more about what Gurian had to offer and found this little tool.  It is called What Stories Does My Son Need?: A Guide to Books and Movies That Build Character in Boys.   

source

The Format

First, there are 100 books and 100 movies chosen over the course of a boy’s life.  These stories are broken up into age groupings that are best appropriate for the child.  Next, Gurian gives 3-4 simple questions to engage your child that highlight certain character traits.  For example, when discussing The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein, he asks, “Can you think of a time when you cared too much about yourself and not enough about someone else?  Why is giving as important as getting?”  The questions are simple, invite engaging conversation and don’t feel laborious.

The Power of a Story

Dr. Gurian says: “A decade of research into child development and the media confirms that until a child’s brain develops fully, it is imprinting, modeling and performing based on imagery it takes in from all social sources, including the media.  Even once we’re adults, our brains remain malleable to media imagery, as the continued effectiveness of commercials confirms.  But among children and adolescents, the effects are even more profound.  Especially until about age sixteen, the greater the exposure a boy gets to stimuli that do not teach compassion and self-restraint, the more difficult it becomes for him to learn such things.”

He goes on to say that storytelling is powerful, but even more powerful neurologically speaking.  To our kids, the stories they watch and hear and read are not only for entertainment but also a fountain of moral teaching as well.  Because of testosterone (the sex and aggression hormone), boys often gravitate toward stimuli that appeal to these aggression-based images.  Therefore, they can be exposed to images and content that is way too mature for their young minds.

If you consider the way humans previously used stories, adults would share folk tales to share stories about heritage, identity and character.  Fairy tales were later introduced to teach young ones how to progress through to maturity and the Bible is used to help our children understand spiritual concepts.  Today however, Gurian says:

“In our contemporary confusion about the worth and substance of stories–a natural confusion, given that millions of stories bombard us daily–we have forgotten their highest use.  In our busy lives, we have been unable to cull the useful stories from the useless.”

But as parents we can share good stories with our kids. This then gives our children the chance to watch (or hear) how someone else displays honor without them having to live it.  Then, when a situation demands their own honor (and we all know it will), they’ve had the time and space to think through how they can and should handle it on their own.  We want to teach and prepare our kids for everything but it is impossible.  But through the power of a story, we can share the experiences of others to prepare them for their own.

Maybe you are a parent of only girls.  Don’t discredit this great resource!  We all want our sons to understand self-sacrifice and empathy.  But girls also need  these traits and to identify these traits in the men around them as well.

You know that I’m very passionate about books and reading to my kids.  But if these stories can help give my kids the tools they need for making the right choice and choosing the right friends, it is worth every penny.  It is my hope that you find this resource valuable for your family as well.

What books or movies are valuable to you for sharing moral lessons with your kids?  What books or movies had a profound impact on you as a child? 

This was originally posted on The Comfort Table by Katherine Salinas. Click here for her original post and to learn more about her.  And click here for more of Katherine’s heart about motherhood.

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